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A review by ciphertextx
The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole Aged 13 ¾ by Sue Townsend, Pat McGowan
4.0
This is one of the funniest fucking books I have ever read in my entire life. In fact, I don't know if I've ever laughed this hard reading a book. How can something that - with all comedy taken away - is so serious and kind of sad be so hilarious?
I've wanted to read this for a little while, I've owned a copy for at least a few months, but I'd never pulled the title out of my box that decides what book I'm reading next. I was talking to a colleague at work literally today about books, and I asked him what his favourite was. Without hesitation, he said "Adrian Mole" and I was like "wait, you know Adrian Mole?" and we had a discussion in which he tried to tell me why I would enjoy it, but he couldn't because he kept trying to quote parts before laughing hysterically. So I read this whole book today (it's only about 300 pages) for Victor!
Adrian Mole is absolutely hilarious. He's sassy, honest, indignant, dramatic, a bit pompous in a really endearing and silly way. He says a lot of things that another person might say if they're attempting to be funny, but Adrian is just 100% serious. If it weren't for all of this, the story would probably be quite a bit more depressing than it was. Because the plot of this year of Adrian's life is basically his parents divorcing and meeting new people (but also Adrian's dad turning to drink, losing his job, letting the house fall into disrepair, getting the electricity cut off, etc), him meeting and caring for an old man who lives alone in squalor with his dog, him being bullied by this guy who keeps taking his money, him worrying obsessively about his acne, and him pining over this girl he likes.
The plot itself...I couldn't care less. I just wanted to see what Adrian had to say about it all. Like, his opinion matters so much not just because he's the main character, but because his thoughts are always downright entertaining. I have a hundred and one quotes I could share with you guys. It's hard to choose just a few, because they're all so great. Here are some quotes, followed by further evidence of his drama.
"Just measured my thing. It has grown one centimetre. Might be needing it soon."
"I was wracked with sexuality."
"As I write Mr and Mrs Ball are canoeing on the loch. They must be on drugs."
"If my mother doesn't come home soon I will end up deprived and maladjusted. I am already neglected."
"My nipples have swollen!!"
"My fellow pupils are nothing but Philistines and Morons!"
"I am seriously thinking of giving up everything and running away to become a tramp."
And now, some of my favourite weird and funny things, in no particular order!
After the incident with his nipples swelling (a normal part of puberty for teenage boys), Adrian tells his teacher he can't do PE classes because of his swollen nipples. He's very serious about this. On the same note, he also dramatically feels like he's dying after having his tonsils removed, and he refuses to leave the hospital for several days. At some point, Adrian shop-lifts something and feels so terribly guilty about it that he calls the Samaritans (a UK charity that offers anyone in emotional distress support). On a school trip, the kids drive the coach driver to the point of Extreme Rage, and Adrian is too shaken up to write about it, but then in his next entry he describes himself as having "nerves of steel". He refers to his normal teenage acne as a "disability", because he's extra.
There are other really weird or funny things dotted throughout, such as some racist in a grocery store only buying rhubarb (because it's the only fruit that's actually English in the store) and comparing said rhubarb to a penis by describing it as "phallic". Lucas' wife running away to live her best lesbian life, which led to Lucas getting together with Adrian's mum, who calls him "Bimbo".
The narrative voice is so dry yet serious that literally every tiny thing is funny, even if it's really not. It's all in the wording. "They got on all right at first but then Bert remembered he was a communist."
If you want a laugh and you can handle the time-accurate offensive terminology and language, this book will do it. I don't know what else to say about it. This book was funny, which took away from how dark and heavy it might have been at times. Very unique!
I've wanted to read this for a little while, I've owned a copy for at least a few months, but I'd never pulled the title out of my box that decides what book I'm reading next. I was talking to a colleague at work literally today about books, and I asked him what his favourite was. Without hesitation, he said "Adrian Mole" and I was like "wait, you know Adrian Mole?" and we had a discussion in which he tried to tell me why I would enjoy it, but he couldn't because he kept trying to quote parts before laughing hysterically. So I read this whole book today (it's only about 300 pages) for Victor!
Adrian Mole is absolutely hilarious. He's sassy, honest, indignant, dramatic, a bit pompous in a really endearing and silly way. He says a lot of things that another person might say if they're attempting to be funny, but Adrian is just 100% serious. If it weren't for all of this, the story would probably be quite a bit more depressing than it was. Because the plot of this year of Adrian's life is basically his parents divorcing and meeting new people (but also Adrian's dad turning to drink, losing his job, letting the house fall into disrepair, getting the electricity cut off, etc), him meeting and caring for an old man who lives alone in squalor with his dog, him being bullied by this guy who keeps taking his money, him worrying obsessively about his acne, and him pining over this girl he likes.
The plot itself...I couldn't care less. I just wanted to see what Adrian had to say about it all. Like, his opinion matters so much not just because he's the main character, but because his thoughts are always downright entertaining. I have a hundred and one quotes I could share with you guys. It's hard to choose just a few, because they're all so great. Here are some quotes, followed by further evidence of his drama.
"Just measured my thing. It has grown one centimetre. Might be needing it soon."
"I was wracked with sexuality."
"As I write Mr and Mrs Ball are canoeing on the loch. They must be on drugs."
"If my mother doesn't come home soon I will end up deprived and maladjusted. I am already neglected."
"My nipples have swollen!!"
"My fellow pupils are nothing but Philistines and Morons!"
"I am seriously thinking of giving up everything and running away to become a tramp."
And now, some of my favourite weird and funny things, in no particular order!
After the incident with his nipples swelling (a normal part of puberty for teenage boys), Adrian tells his teacher he can't do PE classes because of his swollen nipples. He's very serious about this. On the same note, he also dramatically feels like he's dying after having his tonsils removed, and he refuses to leave the hospital for several days. At some point, Adrian shop-lifts something and feels so terribly guilty about it that he calls the Samaritans (a UK charity that offers anyone in emotional distress support). On a school trip, the kids drive the coach driver to the point of Extreme Rage, and Adrian is too shaken up to write about it, but then in his next entry he describes himself as having "nerves of steel". He refers to his normal teenage acne as a "disability", because he's extra.
There are other really weird or funny things dotted throughout, such as some racist in a grocery store only buying rhubarb (because it's the only fruit that's actually English in the store) and comparing said rhubarb to a penis by describing it as "phallic". Lucas' wife running away to live her best lesbian life, which led to Lucas getting together with Adrian's mum, who calls him "Bimbo".
The narrative voice is so dry yet serious that literally every tiny thing is funny, even if it's really not. It's all in the wording. "They got on all right at first but then Bert remembered he was a communist."
If you want a laugh and you can handle the time-accurate offensive terminology and language, this book will do it. I don't know what else to say about it. This book was funny, which took away from how dark and heavy it might have been at times. Very unique!