A review by annemariewellswriter
Why Men Love Bitches: From Doormat to Dreamgirl— A Woman's Guide to Holding Her Own in a Relationship by Sherry Argov
4.0
TL;DR Horrific title, heteronormative language, but actually not awful insights on self-empowerment.
I think this title is horrific, and I hope to god that Sherry was made to change her original title because publishers thought this title more eye-catching or something. It should be "From Doormat to Your OWN FUCKING HERO BECAUSE YOU DONT NEED A GODDAMN MAN TO LIVE YOUR GODDAMN LIFE." But since the book focused on relationships and not independence and self-reliance, you are made to believe that being someone's dreamgirl should be your end goal.
Besides the atrocious title and being completely heteronormative, I think the overall message is a good one. Argov wants to empower women and to teach women how to stand up for themselves while dating. She wants to help women navigate their own desires while understanding that we want to impress a potential partner and be kind and also not exhaust ourselves or drive ourselves into the ground with unmanageable self- and partner-driven expectations.
There was some really solid advice for anybody to not be taken advantage of and to recognize the signs of potential emotional abuse, using, and gaslighting. I was recommended to read this book by a fellow feminist and to ignore the awful title. After I read this book, I definitely kept my wants and needs more in the forefront of my psyche in relationships, and use techniques from this book to stand up for myself and to make clear what I'm willing to put into a relationship and what I am not willing.
I think this title is horrific, and I hope to god that Sherry was made to change her original title because publishers thought this title more eye-catching or something. It should be "From Doormat to Your OWN FUCKING HERO BECAUSE YOU DONT NEED A GODDAMN MAN TO LIVE YOUR GODDAMN LIFE." But since the book focused on relationships and not independence and self-reliance, you are made to believe that being someone's dreamgirl should be your end goal.
Besides the atrocious title and being completely heteronormative, I think the overall message is a good one. Argov wants to empower women and to teach women how to stand up for themselves while dating. She wants to help women navigate their own desires while understanding that we want to impress a potential partner and be kind and also not exhaust ourselves or drive ourselves into the ground with unmanageable self- and partner-driven expectations.
There was some really solid advice for anybody to not be taken advantage of and to recognize the signs of potential emotional abuse, using, and gaslighting. I was recommended to read this book by a fellow feminist and to ignore the awful title. After I read this book, I definitely kept my wants and needs more in the forefront of my psyche in relationships, and use techniques from this book to stand up for myself and to make clear what I'm willing to put into a relationship and what I am not willing.