lory_enterenchanted's reviews
326 reviews
Sweet Bean Paste by Durian Sukegawa
emotional
hopeful
informative
mysterious
reflective
sad
Read for my "Make me read it challenge," chosen for me by blog readers. I enjoyed this little tale in which a love for traditional Japanese food really shines through, along with a heartfelt message for understanding and compassion toward those who appear different and seem threatening. I will always think of "listening to the beans" now when I see adzukis!
Our Souls at Night by Kent Haruf
emotional
reflective
sad
I'd heard of this book for years, now I have finally read it -a quick but thought-provoking read. I won't soon forget the characters who really came to life for me, through their moving, tender and ultimately heart-breaking encounter.
Kindergeschichten by Peter Bichsel
dark
reflective
sad
Read for the Easy German Book Club. Absurd little stories about human failures to connect and communicate, not really for children.
The Telling by Ursula K. Le Guin
dark
mysterious
reflective
sad
"It's all we have. You see? It's the way we have the world. Without the telling, we don't have anything at all. The moment goes by like the water of the river. We'd tumble and spin and be helpless if we tried to live in the moment. We'd be like a baby. A baby can do it, but we'd drown. Our minds need to tell, need the telling. To hold. The past has passed, and there's nothing in the future to catch hold of. The future is nothing yet. How could anybody live there? So what we have is the words that tell what happened and what happens. What was and what is....We're not outside the world, yoz. You know? We are the world. We're its language. So we live and it lives. You see? If we don't say the words, what is there in our world?" 676
"Not the Logos, the Word, but words. Not one, but many, many...Nobody made the world, ruled the world, told the world to be. It was. And human beings made it be, made it be a human world, by saying it? By telling what was in it and what happened in it?"
"Lying here, a prisoner of his injuries, dependent on his enemies, he had no power at all except in silence. To give it up, to let it go, to speak, took valor. It cost him all he had left."
"Not the Logos, the Word, but words. Not one, but many, many...Nobody made the world, ruled the world, told the world to be. It was. And human beings made it be, made it be a human world, by saying it? By telling what was in it and what happened in it?"
"Lying here, a prisoner of his injuries, dependent on his enemies, he had no power at all except in silence. To give it up, to let it go, to speak, took valor. It cost him all he had left."
Run Towards the Danger: Confrontations with a Body of Memory by Sarah Polley
adventurous
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
5.0
Sarah Polley is my new hero. Fascinating, horrifying and beautifully written stories about life in a vulnerable body. I wish only there were more about her parents as I’m sure their stories would illuminate where some of her pain came from.
Krabat by Otfried Preußler
adventurous
dark
mysterious
tense
Read in German for my Summer in Other Languages challenge.
Thoughts to come on the blog: enterenchanted.com
Thoughts to come on the blog: enterenchanted.com
The Mindful Body: Thinking Our Way to Chronic Health by Ellen J Langer, Ellen J Langer
Did not finish book.
Did not finish book.
Something about this book made me uncomfortable. Even though I agree mind and body should be seen as a unity, it seemed to be suggesting that there is no physical reality apart from our thoughts and feelings, a kind of gnostic denial of matter. I am concerned about the "toxic positivity" that can result when we believe we can think ourselves out of all illnesses and troubles.
I looked up Ellen Langer and found that there has been some criticism of some of the studies that made her famous and that she continues to cite in this book; they were discredited or never published in peer-reviewed journals.
I am also skeptical about the placebo effect. I have struggled with health issues for many years. I have taken many remedies and tried many therapies. I really wanted to believe these would work, and for a time some seemed to be working. Then my symptoms would come back. Do placebos not work on me? What about the remedies that do seem to work better? What is the difference, when my attitude has not changed?
Again, I fully agree that the mind has an effect on bodily health, and vice versa. And I'm not a fan of conventional medicine, either. But the claims here seem extreme.
Langer's painful experience with her mother, who experienced a spontaneous remission of cancer but then was treated as if she was still sick, and subsequently died,, may have clouded her judgment. She seems to so strongly wish that we could overcome our illnesses with the power of the mind, that she is finding evidence to show that it is true. But I don't feel as though I can trust her. Something is out of balance in her work, which is a shame, because it could be so valuable.
Stopped reading a bit over halfway through when my trust in the author failed. Although it would be important to read as an example of current thinking on the topic, I decided not to spend my time on that.
I looked up Ellen Langer and found that there has been some criticism of some of the studies that made her famous and that she continues to cite in this book; they were discredited or never published in peer-reviewed journals.
I am also skeptical about the placebo effect. I have struggled with health issues for many years. I have taken many remedies and tried many therapies. I really wanted to believe these would work, and for a time some seemed to be working. Then my symptoms would come back. Do placebos not work on me? What about the remedies that do seem to work better? What is the difference, when my attitude has not changed?
Again, I fully agree that the mind has an effect on bodily health, and vice versa. And I'm not a fan of conventional medicine, either. But the claims here seem extreme.
Langer's painful experience with her mother, who experienced a spontaneous remission of cancer but then was treated as if she was still sick, and subsequently died,, may have clouded her judgment. She seems to so strongly wish that we could overcome our illnesses with the power of the mind, that she is finding evidence to show that it is true. But I don't feel as though I can trust her. Something is out of balance in her work, which is a shame, because it could be so valuable.
Stopped reading a bit over halfway through when my trust in the author failed. Although it would be important to read as an example of current thinking on the topic, I decided not to spend my time on that.
The Christmas Appeal by Janice Hallett
dark
funny
lighthearted
mysterious
A return to the scene of Janice Hallett's first book, The Appeal - and after reading her two intervening books, I found it a very welcome diversion. The little-theater setting is the most entertaining thing about her books; I can do without the epistolary gimmick and hope she'll consider dropping it for a future book. It just is not credible that people would write all those text messages!
Spare by Prince Harry
challenging
dark
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
tense
"I suppose I knew the truth deep in my heart. The illusion of Mummy hiding, preparing to return, was never so real that it could blot out reality entirely. But it blotted it out enough that I was able to postpone the bulk of my grief. I still hadn't mourned, still hadn't cried, except that one time at her grae, sill hadn't processed the bare facts. Part of my brain knew, but part of it was wholly insulated, and the division between these two parts kept the parliament of my consciousness divided, polarized, gridlocked. Just as I wanted it." Part 1 Ch 31
"In between the runs we'd drag our bodies up ropes, or hurl them at walls, or ram them against each other. At night something more than pain would creep into our bones. It was a deep, shuddering throb. There was no way to survive that throb except to dissociate from it, tell your mind that you were not it. Sunder your mind from yourself. The color sergeants said this was part of their Grand Plan. Kill the Self." Part 1 Ch. 54
"I'd never asked to be financially dependent on Pa. I'd been forced into this surreal state, this unending Truman Show in which I almost never used money, never owned a car, never carried a house key, never once ordered anything online, never received a single box from Amazon, almost never traveled on the Underground. (once at Eton, on a theater trip.) Sponge, the papers called me. But there's a big difference between being a sponge and being prohibited from learning independence. After decades of being rigorously and systematically infantilized, I was now abruptly abandoned, and mocked for being immature? For not standing on my own two feet?" Part 3 Ch 81
"They began talking over each other. We've been down this road a hundred times, they said. You're delusional, Harry. But they were the delusional ones." Part 3 Ch 86
"How lost we are, I thought. How far we've strayed. How much damage has been done to our love, our bond, and why? All because a dreadful mob of dweebs and crones and cut-rate criminals and clinically diagnosable sadists along Fleet Street feel the need to get their jollies and plump their profits -- and work out their personal issues -- by tormenting one very large, very ancient, very dysfunctional family." Part 3 Ch 86
[After describing a rare moment of sharing intimacy with William, after a hunt] "But now I saw that even our finest moments, and my best memories, somehow involved death. Our lives were built on death, our brightest days shadowed by it. Looking back, I didn't see spots of time, but dances with death. I saw how we steeped ourselves in it. We christened and crowned, graduated and married, passed out and passed over our beloveds' bones. Windsor Castle itself was a tomb, the walls filled with ancestors. The Tower of London was held together with the blood of animals, used by the original builders a thousand years ago to temper the mortar between the bricks. Outsiders called us a cult, but maybe we were a death cult, and wasn't that a little bit more depraved? ... Willy was still talking, Pa was talking over him and I could no longer hear a word they said. I was already gone, already on my way to California, a voice in my head saying: Enough death--enough. When is someone in this family going to break free and live?" Part 3 Ch 86
"In between the runs we'd drag our bodies up ropes, or hurl them at walls, or ram them against each other. At night something more than pain would creep into our bones. It was a deep, shuddering throb. There was no way to survive that throb except to dissociate from it, tell your mind that you were not it. Sunder your mind from yourself. The color sergeants said this was part of their Grand Plan. Kill the Self." Part 1 Ch. 54
"I'd never asked to be financially dependent on Pa. I'd been forced into this surreal state, this unending Truman Show in which I almost never used money, never owned a car, never carried a house key, never once ordered anything online, never received a single box from Amazon, almost never traveled on the Underground. (once at Eton, on a theater trip.) Sponge, the papers called me. But there's a big difference between being a sponge and being prohibited from learning independence. After decades of being rigorously and systematically infantilized, I was now abruptly abandoned, and mocked for being immature? For not standing on my own two feet?" Part 3 Ch 81
"They began talking over each other. We've been down this road a hundred times, they said. You're delusional, Harry. But they were the delusional ones." Part 3 Ch 86
"How lost we are, I thought. How far we've strayed. How much damage has been done to our love, our bond, and why? All because a dreadful mob of dweebs and crones and cut-rate criminals and clinically diagnosable sadists along Fleet Street feel the need to get their jollies and plump their profits -- and work out their personal issues -- by tormenting one very large, very ancient, very dysfunctional family." Part 3 Ch 86
[After describing a rare moment of sharing intimacy with William, after a hunt] "But now I saw that even our finest moments, and my best memories, somehow involved death. Our lives were built on death, our brightest days shadowed by it. Looking back, I didn't see spots of time, but dances with death. I saw how we steeped ourselves in it. We christened and crowned, graduated and married, passed out and passed over our beloveds' bones. Windsor Castle itself was a tomb, the walls filled with ancestors. The Tower of London was held together with the blood of animals, used by the original builders a thousand years ago to temper the mortar between the bricks. Outsiders called us a cult, but maybe we were a death cult, and wasn't that a little bit more depraved? ... Willy was still talking, Pa was talking over him and I could no longer hear a word they said. I was already gone, already on my way to California, a voice in my head saying: Enough death--enough. When is someone in this family going to break free and live?" Part 3 Ch 86
Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence by Anna Lembke
challenging
dark
hopeful
informative
reflective
This book had interesting parts, disturbing parts, and missing parts.
Interesting:
- Information about the pleasure / pain balance, and how pursuing only pleasure actually causes pain, and encourages addictive cycles.
- Pain suppression, one of the cornerstones of modern medicine, is thus making pain worse and causing addiction.
- This system evolved in conditions of scarcity where it made sense. In the condition of abundance we have created, we are devouring ourselves.
- Turning toward pain with mindfulness, not resisting it, actually mitigates pain.
- Radical honesty as a healing force.
- The endless loop of destructive shame (fear of punishment, or punishment and shunning, leading to silence and lying about one's guilt), vs. the unfolding spiral of pro-social shame (admitting guilt and making reparation)
Disturbing:
- Passage where "self-binding" (i.e. taking measures to ensure abstinence by making an addiction difficult or impossible to fulfill) is equated to "customs" of body-concealing dress for women in Muslim and Mormon traditions, as if this is an appropriate way to help curb addiction. There is no acknowledgement of how this leads to the oppression and objectification of women, or the way it makes women responsible for men's inability to control their appetites.
- Using pain to increase pleasure seems awfully close to masochism ...
- Last section about "club goods" and the success of religious groups - the perks related to being an "in" group, weeding out freeloaders, etc. The mentality is foreign to me and seems vaguely totalitarian. It's certainly not Christian, in any true sense!
Missing:
- Not much discussion at all about what are actually the root causes for addiction, what needs to be worked out on a soul level. The techniques given seem to be for sort of just coping with life, not actual healing or insight.
- Abstinence is essential to recovery, but what about people who can't just stop? How about finding out what is behind their craving, besides the physiology? (Again.)
- The lack of insight includes the author's own issues with her mother, which would seem to need more work. The author's honesty about this and her romance-novel dependency is laudable, but also reveals some remaining blind spots.
- I suspect there is probably a lot of dopamine deprivation in early childhood, from misguided or suboptimal parenting. Young children are so overlooked, because they can't talk and don't remember those formative experiences. Parents very often have their own trauma, that can be handed down genetically as well as affecting parenting behavior. Our modern culture is also anti-baby health and highly stressful for mothers. The book doesn't really go into this topic.
- Isn't the flood of dopamine-raising substances and activities a substitute for meaningful spiritual activity and human relationship? What is the role of beneficial relationships in healing us and keeping us healthy? There could be much more about that.
LESSONS OF THE BALANCE
1. The relentless pursuit of pleasure (and avoidance of pain) leads to pain.
2. Recovery begins with abstinence.
3. Abstinence resets the brain's reward pathway and with it our capacity to take joy in simpler pleasures.
4. Self-binding creates literal and metacognitive space between desire and consumption, a modern necessity in our dopamine-overloaded world.
5. Medications can restore homeostasis, but consider what we lose by medicating away our pain.
6. Pressing on the pain side resets our balance to the side of pleasure.
7. Beware of getting addicted to pain.
8. Radical honesty promotes awareness, enhances intimacy, and fosters a plenty mindset.
9. Prosocial shame affirms that we belong to the human tribe.
10. Instead of running away from the world, we can find escape by immersing ourselves in it.
Interesting:
- Information about the pleasure / pain balance, and how pursuing only pleasure actually causes pain, and encourages addictive cycles.
- Pain suppression, one of the cornerstones of modern medicine, is thus making pain worse and causing addiction.
- This system evolved in conditions of scarcity where it made sense. In the condition of abundance we have created, we are devouring ourselves.
- Turning toward pain with mindfulness, not resisting it, actually mitigates pain.
- Radical honesty as a healing force.
- The endless loop of destructive shame (fear of punishment, or punishment and shunning, leading to silence and lying about one's guilt), vs. the unfolding spiral of pro-social shame (admitting guilt and making reparation)
Disturbing:
- Passage where "self-binding" (i.e. taking measures to ensure abstinence by making an addiction difficult or impossible to fulfill) is equated to "customs" of body-concealing dress for women in Muslim and Mormon traditions, as if this is an appropriate way to help curb addiction. There is no acknowledgement of how this leads to the oppression and objectification of women, or the way it makes women responsible for men's inability to control their appetites.
- Using pain to increase pleasure seems awfully close to masochism ...
- Last section about "club goods" and the success of religious groups - the perks related to being an "in" group, weeding out freeloaders, etc. The mentality is foreign to me and seems vaguely totalitarian. It's certainly not Christian, in any true sense!
Missing:
- Not much discussion at all about what are actually the root causes for addiction, what needs to be worked out on a soul level. The techniques given seem to be for sort of just coping with life, not actual healing or insight.
- Abstinence is essential to recovery, but what about people who can't just stop? How about finding out what is behind their craving, besides the physiology? (Again.)
- The lack of insight includes the author's own issues with her mother, which would seem to need more work. The author's honesty about this and her romance-novel dependency is laudable, but also reveals some remaining blind spots.
- I suspect there is probably a lot of dopamine deprivation in early childhood, from misguided or suboptimal parenting. Young children are so overlooked, because they can't talk and don't remember those formative experiences. Parents very often have their own trauma, that can be handed down genetically as well as affecting parenting behavior. Our modern culture is also anti-baby health and highly stressful for mothers. The book doesn't really go into this topic.
- Isn't the flood of dopamine-raising substances and activities a substitute for meaningful spiritual activity and human relationship? What is the role of beneficial relationships in healing us and keeping us healthy? There could be much more about that.
LESSONS OF THE BALANCE
1. The relentless pursuit of pleasure (and avoidance of pain) leads to pain.
2. Recovery begins with abstinence.
3. Abstinence resets the brain's reward pathway and with it our capacity to take joy in simpler pleasures.
4. Self-binding creates literal and metacognitive space between desire and consumption, a modern necessity in our dopamine-overloaded world.
5. Medications can restore homeostasis, but consider what we lose by medicating away our pain.
6. Pressing on the pain side resets our balance to the side of pleasure.
7. Beware of getting addicted to pain.
8. Radical honesty promotes awareness, enhances intimacy, and fosters a plenty mindset.
9. Prosocial shame affirms that we belong to the human tribe.
10. Instead of running away from the world, we can find escape by immersing ourselves in it.