Reviews tagging 'Death of parent'

Autism in Heels: The Untold Story of a Female Life on the Spectrum by Jennifer Cook O'Toole

5 reviews

bookwren314's review against another edition

informative lighthearted

3.75

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Cancer and Death of parent

amandakitz's review against another edition

emotional informative reflective sad medium-paced

3.0

As a fellow gifted, late-diagnosed autistic, I related to much of this book. She spoke powerfully concerning her own experience, research, and accomplishments, and her commentary on bullying, self-harm, and domestic abuse in the lives of girls and women on the spectrum was moving and gave me an avenue to process many experiences I hadn't processed before.

I can see how some autists would struggle to connect with her giftedness, and I struggled to connect with her material privilege often through this book. There are many privileges that would make her story unrelatable to various people. With that in mind, I found it powerful to see her illustrate that giftedness, conventional attractiveness or "pretty privilege", accomplishments and accolades, fame and fortune still do not overpower the perceptions and expectations neurotypical people have of us and the trauma they can cause. Every time she mentioned one of those privileges and I was tempted to disconnect, I leaned into the message that no privilege protects you from how neurotypicals treat autistic people. I wish she had addressed those privileges and how intersectional identities compound the disadvantages we as autistic people face.

There is one section that is truly problematic. In one section, the author coopts Sojourner Truth's "Aint I a Woman?" speech to make a comment about how neurotypical women treat neurodivergent women as lesser. The well-deserved criticism of this section and the failure to acknowledge her privilege in light of the intersectional identities of folks with marginalized genders on the spectrum should be considered. I hope she listens, honors that criticism, and updates later editions.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Bullying, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Toxic relationship, Medical trauma, Gaslighting, and Sexual harassment

Minor: Child death, Racism, Terminal illness, and Death of parent

There are accounts of medical trauma, gaslighting, and abuse throughout, with whole chapters on bullying, domestic violence, and self harm/eating disorders. She includes warnings at the beginning of those chapters with permission to skip.

laynepetrie's review

slow-paced

0.5

I really wanted to like this book. Sadly, I hated it. What bothered me most:

1. The author’s indirect comparison of herself to Sojourner Truth and also to Barbie. 
2. Her “correction” of what a semicolon tattoo should *really* mean. 
3. The author’s repetitive overgeneralized statements about autistic people, and their traits. 
4. Her borderline diagnostic statements about people who might be driven, organized, particularly skilled at something, etc. 
5. The way she sort of “blames” autism for putting up with an abusive relationship. 
6. The statement that anyone with an eating disorder should be evaluated for autism. 
7. The Christian undertones and shaming of men’s sexuality/desires/behaviors but wild showmanship of her own. 
8. The strict binary view of gender and identity. It’s very cis/hetero heavy. 

Autism diagnoses in non-male individuals needs further exploration, but this book missed the mark, to me. 

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Content Warnings

Moderate: Ableism, Addiction, Body shaming, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, and Classism

Minor: Death of parent and Cultural appropriation

dukeofkel's review against another edition

emotional hopeful informative inspiring medium-paced

3.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Bullying, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Self harm, and Toxic relationship

Moderate: Death of parent

Minor: Ableism, Addiction, Sexual assault, and Sexual harassment

bexi's review

challenging emotional funny informative reflective slow-paced

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Bullying, Emotional abuse, Toxic relationship, and Gaslighting

Moderate: Cancer, Death, Eating disorder, Physical abuse, Sexual assault, Grief, and Death of parent

Minor: Addiction, Body shaming, Cursing, and Self harm