Reviews tagging 'Religious bigotry'

The Trouble with Hating You by Sajni Patel

12 reviews

maya_vee's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75


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blahlicia's review against another edition

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emotional funny hopeful inspiring sad medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

4.0

This book was way better than I expected, but it does deal with some heavy issues that some people may need a content warning for. 

It’s clear the author has a complicated but loving relationship with her culture and the religion she was raised in. This book explores what can happen in a small religious community when the wrong people are in charge and are actively harming others. It is also a romance. Idk I liked it a lot! Definitely gonna read more from this author. 

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extrasaratonin's review against another edition

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dark emotional funny medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5


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joisaddler's review against another edition

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challenging emotional funny sad fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? No
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated

5.0

Definitely hands down one of my most favorite books I have read in a long time. This book has a firm place in my heart and I adore it so deeply. 

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aliciachauhan_'s review against another edition

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challenging dark emotional funny hopeful inspiring lighthearted reflective relaxing sad tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

what can I say about this book? this was the first time reading a book where South Asians were the maim characters specifically Hindu gujarati therefore I felt like i could really relate to it. it was incredibly great to read about things I could specifically relate to such as traditions and beliefs so I felt a lot more connected to the characters than ever. I strongly felt a connection towards Liya as she has the same view as me on marriage and children within an Indian household and wider society. I just hope one day I would would able to experience this type of love in real life because this book was truly beautiful.

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thefatpaperback's review against another edition

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emotional hopeful medium-paced

5.0


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nerdynatreads's review against another edition

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emotional funny tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Character
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

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5 by 5: Enemies to Lovers Trope -- Round 2!

3.5 stars~

So, this story started out a lot heavier than I was anticipating. I thought this was much more rom-com-y, but this has lots of angst that isn’t romantic.

Liya is a strong, independent woman and she will let you know that, but she’s definitely got some trauma that she should be working through in therapy, while Jai seems to be an actually sweet guy dealing with a few inner demons of his own.

I noticed that it seemed like the personalities we would see from the characters would differ depending on whose POV we were in. Liya seemed much more assertive in her own POV, and Jai seemed much cockier in Liya’s POV than in his own. This shift just felt a little odd and made it difficult to get a strong feel for the character’s personalities.

I really like when our two mcs interact. They push each other's buttons and bicker constantly, but also acknowledge that the other is attractive, which is always entertaining. I think I enjoyed the flirty enemy stage of the relationship more than the lovers aspect and I feel bad about it? When they weren’t arguing they were... kind of boring? It felt as though the chemistry had dissipated when they were happy, so I just felt kind of meh about their relationship. I’m also surprised that given the number of discussions around sex and Liya’s impurity in this book, the spice level was maybe half a chile pepper?

The cultural aspect of this story is interesting because you can see from side characters that there are some who are trying to stick to the traditional ways and others who are more progressive and blending tradition with American customs, then Liya, who is almost trying to separate herself from her culture completely. That being said, I’m not Indian or Hindi and have seen some desi reviewers saying that this isn’t the best example of an Indian American lifestyle, so maybe check out ownvoices reviews.

The feminism in this story is also so hamfisted and comes off as preachy, particularly if it’s a piece of dialogue, it’ll come across as unrealistic that anyone would talk in that sort of way. It’s cringey. It eventually calm down ****because the narrative around Liya shifted as we learned more about her past. We had a final confrontation which did give her some closure and felt much more natural. Plus, we know I love serious issues being brought up in my romances.

The third act drama made sense for the story and the characters, thankfully was not terribly drawn out, and ca 

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readergonewilde's review against another edition

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emotional funny lighthearted fast-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Plot
  • Strong character development? Yes
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0


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sadiaa's review against another edition

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emotional medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? A mix
  • Loveable characters? Yes
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes

5.0


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spearly's review against another edition

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emotional tense medium-paced
  • Plot- or character-driven? Plot
  • Strong character development? It's complicated
  • Loveable characters? No
  • Diverse cast of characters? Yes
  • Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.0

Whenever Liya glanced at me, which wasn’t often, she had daggers for stares. Her annoyance level was ridiculous. But as soon as Ma engaged her in conversation, she was someone else entirely

The Trouble with Hating You is a story told in dual POV by Liya, a forward-thinking, stubborn, non-traditional Hindu girl who has effectively been shunned by her community due to her sexual history and no-nonsense demeanour, and Jay, an all-around "nice-guy" (my quotation marks, no the authors) who loved his family and has a grin that could drop your panties. They first meet when Liya literally runs into him when she's escaping dinner with her parents, because as she finds out, they plan to ambush her with the appearance of Jay, with whom they are trying to set her up in an arranged marriage.

I'm not going to pretend to know the intricacies of Hinduism or Indian culture, but I had a major problem with the insidious misogyny in this book. It was most likely included to foil our progressive couple, and the author does a great job tearing it down, particularly at the end (which I will get more into), but that didn't make it any less uncomfortable to read about. Still, I liked how Liya was quick to point it out and shut it down. I liked how she kept her head held high when faced with her communities judgement, disdain, and vicious rumours.

But. I didn't particularly like how
her main trauma, the reason that she's so standoffish with guys and never lets anyone in, was because she was assaulted when she was 15. And I really didn't like how Jay is suddenly the one tearing down her walls, healing her. If you want to base your main character's personality on a past trauma, at least let their big breakthrough be something they find within themselves. People don't magically forget their past, their issues, and their scars just because the right person comes along. And if you ARE going to make that the case, then at least show them working through it together. I feel like all we got with Jay and Liya was a few "of course I believe you"s, a few tender kisses, and some long-winded i-love-you speeches at the end that felt more like exposition than a genuine declaration of love.


I ALSO... and this might be controversial.... DON'T LIKE JAY.

Sure, he came through at the end there. But as he's courting Liya, he is such a "nice-guy" it made me literally sick.

Here he is enlisted her friends to convince her to go out with him after she ALREADY SAID NO.

The gist of the twenty-mile-long text chain was this: Jay had asked them to convince me to go out with him! The audacity! Who did he think he was, getting my friends involved? And to make matters worse, of course they were on Team Freaking Jay.

Here he is acting in true nice-guy fashion when Liya continues to turn him down.

I opened my mouth to snap at him, but he walked out and said, “You messed this up, Liya. We would’ve been good together. We could’ve had something real."

Here he is in his inner dialogue calling Liya UNGRATEFUL because he bought her $1400 (!!!) shoes (they are not even friends yet, people), and she was like.... um, take these back weirdo:

Since I’d been helping Liya, that ungrateful woman, for the past few weeks, I’d skipped out on our meals, which upset Ma.

And you're trying to tell me Jay is supposed to be this progressive, "we're always equals mkay? we walk side by side, I will never be above you, we're gonna be uNtRAdiTIonAL like that" kinda guy? I got some news for you....

Anyway he asks her out like 5 times I think before she finally caves. And, look, okay, I get it's a romance novel and the whole point is that she wanted to say yes and he could tell that, and that it's supposed to be romantic that he doesn't give up, but like... how many times do women need to say no for men to take the fucking hint? How many times do men keep pushing because they think we, like Liya, actually want to say yes but are playing hard to get?

(I apologize for that very heteronormative statement. In my personal experience, and the experience of nearly very woman in my life, however, it has always been the man who doesn't take no for an answer.)

And this isn't a fluffy rom-com novel where that sort of toxic behaviour doesn't speak to any deeper issues within that novel's world. When it's all fluff, things aren't that deep. But this is a novel with heavy themes, like deep-rooted sexism in religion, believing women, family dynamics in traditional households... I couldn't ignore Jay's character, and it doesn't stack up against the other themes of the novel.

Unrelated, I found the whole workplace drama thing boring and unnecessary.

Also unrelated, is anyone else hella bothered when a character is like, declaring their love and is all "I fell in love the first moment I saw you" (or in Jay's case: “I’ve been in love with you since the day you walked into that diner, when I took you home and decided to buy these damn shoes.”) when it's so obviously not true? 

Um. I think that's most of what I thought. I could probably add more but this review is too long already. 

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