Reviews with content warning for Mental illness - Someone Else's Shoes

Depressing to begin with, ending in predictable. This is not a romance. It is also not about friendship. It is an interesting book about a woman who accidentally takes someone else's shoes, ruined by the story of the woman who's shoes she takes. I can't even describe how awful I felt while reading this book, all the joy is completely missing until the 75% mark.

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daniomasits's review against another edition

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emotional slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.75

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morahsharon1's review

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adventurous emotional mysterious fast-paced

Plot- or character-driven? A mix
Strong character development? Yes
Loveable characters? Yes
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.25

Fun. There were stressful scenes. "Women of a certain age."

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jaxgirl007's review

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slow-paced

Plot- or character-driven? Plot
Strong character development? No
Loveable characters? No
Diverse cast of characters? Yes
Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

1.5

I usually pick one word to start my review. Well, I have so many words for this one, I'm jumping right in. Get ready for a rant. Because I don't hand out 1.5 star lightly.

When I started this one, I thought it would be something like the ladies had their bags switched, met up to trade and then they would help each other through their various crises(growth and hugs all around). What I got was: 'A Guide to Cramming as Many Plot Device Tropes as Possible into 435 Pages.' However, JoJo decided to title it 'Someone Else's Shoes' thinking we wouldn't be any the wiser. After 435 pages, I'm wiser. And bitter. And I am here to tell you exactly what that looks like.

SPOILERS AHEAD- DO NOT READ UNLESS YOU ARE OK WITH MAJOR SPOILERS

Sam and Nisha attend a gym session and shower up at the same time. They have the same bag (Sam's a knock-off, Nisha's authentic) and in her rush Sam picks up the wrong one. They both discover they have the wrong bag. Now they're in 'someone else's shoes'...literally. This was interesting.

At that point, Nisha goes to her hotel to pick up some of her clothes. But, wouldn't you know it, her husband has picked that exact moment to decide they are separating and he won't give her anything...not her clothes, not her passport, cuts her bank cards....zilch. So, now Nisha wants her bag. But there's a problem...

Because even though she has tens of thousands of dollars in clothing and accessories that don't belong to her, Sam just 'can't seem to manage to get back to the gym right that day' to return Nisha's bag. She goes to a few client meetings, work lunch, Happy Hour...all while wearing the designer shoes and Chanel jacket that she doesn't own. Sam goes to the gym the next day to try and make the bag exchange but...the gym is closed. Whomp, whomp. So poor Sam is left with no other option than to keep wearing the jacket and shoes because she feels great in them...a version of herself that has been dormant all these years. Because turning it in at the police station isn't an option. Is that a crime to keep tens of thousands of dollars in merchandise that doesn't belong to you? JoJo Moyes doesn't care and so I guess she figures the reader shouldn't either.

So, if you're keeping score we're sitting at: Somewhat of a Reality: 0 vs JoJo Moyes' completely absurd plot: 2

While Sam is out doing amazing things with her life in the shoes and jacket she doesn't own, Nisha's life is utterly unamazing since she has zero money, zero clothes, zero passport. At this point, I would think the character described as an uber-rich jet setter would hightail it to the US Embassy to obtain assistance since I don't think it's at all legal to withhold an adult's passport and wallet. Instead, Nisha pushes her way into the hotel and they mistake her for a maid. Hmmm...US Embassy assistance vs. Undocumented Maid Job...I need a judge's ruling for this one. Oh, wait, the judge is JoJo Moyes...so undocumented maid job it is! Yes, Nisha is now an undocumented maid in the hotel where her husband (and clothes...can't.forget.the.clothes) is staying so that she can somehow get access to him (and the clothes...can't forget the clothes).

Now we enter a whole subplot with Nisha's maid in the US and sending an investigator with dirt on Nisha's husband to meet with Nisha in a pub. But Nisha...the lady who is an international jet setter...apparently has zero pictures on Google. So the maid does the next best thing and sends the investigator a picture of...the missing shoes. This means the PI delivers the incriminating husband evidence to Sam...who is wearing the shoes at the pub for Happy Hour. Isn't life a gas?!

So, now we're at: Somewhat of a reality: 0 vs JoJo Moyes' completely absurd plot: 5

The only good point of this novel is Jasmine: a co-worker Nisha meets at the hotel. Jasmine is the only character recognizable as someone that may actually exist. And I was hoping she would be set for life after this mess of a story (and she did get her dress shop, thank goodness).

But other than Jasmine, I just can't by this point. I put the book down and was wondering if I could finish. But I just couldn't imagine how this book could be any more draining. Because all we needed to do was get Nisha her shoes so she could get a divorce settlement and Sam some good karma to help with what she's dealing with. So I decided (after starting and finishing 5 other books) to push on. Did I mention that I couldn't imagine how this could be more draining because all we needed to do was get the shoes, the divorce settlement and the good karma? Well, never fear...JoJo filled in all the blanks in my imagination with the second half of this mess.

I'm going to bullet point here:

1) Sam and Nisha get luvahs. Nisha's is a cook (because that's what usually happens!). Sam gets a caring co-worker but gives him up for her husband that she spent 375 pages complaining about;
2) Speaking of Sam's husband (Phil). He lost his job and his Dad and so is suffering from a massive depressive episode. I do not take mental illness lightly...but I also did not enjoy going through Phil's
recovery. No pills for him, just therapy he hates (actually I hated it too) until he goes back to live with his mother and figures out that he can't handle that...(one realistic part of the story). What does this have to do with the shoes, the divorce and the good karma? Oh, nothing.
3) Sam's best friend (Andrea) is being treated for cancer. The Doctor says she's going to be as OK as they think she can be, which means she's good for where's she's at right now. Sam and Andrea are way more excited with this diagnosis than I am...is the Dr. allergic to the word remission? What does this have to do with the shoes, the divorce and the good karma? Nothing!
4) Both Sam and Nisha's children are having issues. What does this have to do with the shoes, the divorce and the good karma? Still nothing
5) Sam's parents are completely oblivious to her pain and take advantage of her. What does this have to do with the shoes, the divorce and the good karma? Absolutely nothing!!
6) Sam's boss creates a hostile work environment with age and gender discrimination and eventually fires her. What does this have to do with the shoes, the divorce and the good karma? N.o.t.h.i.n.g.
7) Sam and Nisha eventually reunite to have a blow-out...Nisha gets her Chanel jacket back...but not her shoes (still 100pgs from the end). So, now the ladies (Sam, Nisha, Andrea and Jasmine) are now a tight sisterhood who plot to get the shoes back. This, includes the shoes being donated to charity, being sold to some lady who abuses animals, a fake prize getaway weekend and a hotel fire alarm While much more on topic with the shoes, settlement and karma, it registered ridiculous on the somewhat reality meter.
8) Nisha's husband is revealed to be a drug smuggler (he hides the gems in the heels of Nisha's shoes...isn't life a gas?!). Nisha glue guns her heels back together. You heard me...a glue gun.
9) Nisha confronts her husband and gets her divorce settlement. She takes a pittance but she uses the incriminating evidence (remember that? Well Sam forgot but remembered again just in time...whew!) to blackmail him into never bothering her 5 minute friends, her son and her any more. And she gets her clothes (hallelujah, I didn't think she'd ever shut up about them).
10) Nisha goes home to see her son in the US, Nisha's now 10 minute friends each get one diamond from Nisha's husbands latest batch of gems (not too many...just one each. This makes it more realistic. Yes, that's it...more realistic) and her now ex-husband is arrested for smuggling

Are you still with me? Wait, I mean, JoJo. Because JoJo is the one that got all of this into 435 pages. Now that I think on it...maybe this would have worked better as a 'Chose Your Own Adventure'. Yes, I think that would have been great. You could pick what you wanted to read about (Sam's job issues, Nisha's high profile divorce, the BFF with cancer, the ex-husband smuggler, the depressive episode husband) and still reach an ending within 150 pages. Now, that...I think I could have been happy with that.

Final Score: Somewhat of a Reality: 0 vs JoJo Moyes' completely absurd plot: 15

Content Warnings