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zgreyz's review against another edition
adventurous
emotional
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Homophobia, Racial slurs, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Police brutality, and Sexual harassment
Moderate: Racism
melm1216's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
Before writing my reviews and rating my books I have the tendency to see what other people have to say, and I think this is when I have to mark my own opinion. I don't have many words to say about this, but it tugged at me and it was so poignant to see how a person shifted from naive to an activist and how he learned to make decisions for himself. I see people complaining about the lack of lesbian representation, but I think it's important to remember that this was written from the perspective of a Black gay man (other individuals who are often left out of the narrative) who ran in predominantly gay male circles after growing up in Ohio. He is a flawed main character who spent most of the book in his own bubble. And if you keep that in mind while you read, this will squeeze your heart strings.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Hate crime, Homophobia, Racism, Sexual assault, Terminal illness, Police brutality, and Pandemic/Epidemic
Minor: Drug use
virginia_vex's review against another edition
adventurous
hopeful
informative
inspiring
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? No
3.5
Content Warnings
Minor: Child death, Death, Homophobia, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Sexual violence, Police brutality, Medical content, Medical trauma, and Pandemic/Epidemic
mirandalikesbooks's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
sad
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
I really liked this book! Trey, the POV character, is loveable in his flaws. You definitely end up rooting for him. I learned a lot about gay history and black history through the footnotes. I liked the footnotes and definitely missed them when I switched to the audiobook format!
My issue with the book is it feels as if some of the plot threads weren't fully fleshed out. I also think the ending was ABRUPT.
My issue with the book is it feels as if some of the plot threads weren't fully fleshed out. I also think the ending was ABRUPT.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racism, Sexual assault, Sexual content, and Pandemic/Epidemic
Moderate: Addiction, Cursing, Death, Drug use, Hate crime, Racial slurs, Violence, Grief, Murder, Toxic friendship, and Classism
Minor: Adult/minor relationship, Bullying, Child abuse, Child death, Police brutality, and Alcohol
iseefirede's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
reflective
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
A wonderful and informative read. I loved the footnotes with the history interwoven into the story.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Child death, Cursing, Death, Drug use, Hate crime, Homophobia, Infidelity, Misogyny, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexism, Terminal illness, Transphobia, Violence, Vomit, Police brutality, Grief, Religious bigotry, Lesbophobia, Outing, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, Alcohol, Classism, and Pandemic/Epidemic
daralexandria's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Racism, Terminal illness, Police brutality, Medical content, and Medical trauma
aduqu's review against another edition
emotional
informative
inspiring
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.5
I really loved this book and am definitely going to recommend it to others. The footnotes were incredibly interesting and informative, and I learned a lot about queer history.
My only hang up about this book is that as a novel, it has two shortcomings. 1) Sometimes it feels like the main character has all the answers - Trey doesn't often face real consequences for his actions but is a compelling character all the same. And 2) this book doesn't have the type of tied up ending that you expect with a novel. It ends in the middle of a bigger story, and given that the struggle for equality is still ongoing, I think ending it any other way would be disingenuous. Both of these are such minor complaints - I cannot stress how good this book is.
My only hang up about this book is that as a novel, it has two shortcomings. 1) Sometimes it feels like the main character has all the answers - Trey doesn't often face real consequences for his actions but is a compelling character all the same. And 2) this book doesn't have the type of tied up ending that you expect with a novel. It ends in the middle of a bigger story, and given that the struggle for equality is still ongoing, I think ending it any other way would be disingenuous. Both of these are such minor complaints - I cannot stress how good this book is.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Homophobia, Racism, Sexual content, and Terminal illness
Moderate: Child death, Racial slurs, Police brutality, Murder, and Lesbophobia
saramarie_reads's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
funny
informative
inspiring
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Homophobia, Racism, Sexual content, Terminal illness, Police brutality, Medical content, and Pandemic/Epidemic
shansometimes's review against another edition
challenging
informative
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
I've never read anything like this book before. MY GOVERNMENT MEANS TO KILL ME is a fiction book that reads like a powerful, unsparing memoir. It's about, as the official description perfectly describes, "the personal and political awakening of a young gay Black man in 1980s NYC."
The main character, 18-year-old Trey, is trying to find his way in the city after intentionally estranging from his wealthy parents. A few things he's faced with include housing woes (and even a rent strike), grief over his brother's death during his childhood, and, perhaps most notably, the US government's deliberate inaction during the AIDS crisis.
MY GOVERNMENT MEANS TO KILL ME is a hard-hitting story with plenty of conflict and intrigue. There was always something happening in this story, so it kept my attention even though it was a little all over the place. It covered a lot—maybe too much, considering how short the book is. It's dramatic, educational, sexy, funny, and challenging. It won't be a book for every reader for many reasons, including the descriptive language around sex and drugs that some might find unbearably crude. However, given the reality of a person like Trey's life, a type of person who has absolutely existed throughout history, the content is honest and accurate.
My biggest gripe with this book intersects with my favorite thing about it. It's heavy on historical references and even uses real people (historical figures) as characters in the story. I questioned the ethics of that and the speculation and stereotyping it opens those figures up to. Real people, such as Dorothy Cotton, Larry Kramer, James Baldwin, Bayard Rustin (who played a major part in the story and is depicted as a frequent bathhouse patron), and many others, are characters in this novel. We don't know how much of their characterization is accurate and I've seen some reviewers call out some of it for being a misrepresentation of the person's life and activism. If I had led a significant life and someone wrote me into their novel having fictional sex in scenarios I might've never been in or saying things I might not have co-signed, I'd be pissed from the grave.
On the other hand, I learned a lot from this book because of the historical references and frequent footnotes about them. I love my career as a writer, but reading about Trey's burgeoning activism was exciting and made me long for my college dream of being a civil rights lawyer. A lot happened very quickly in this book, and it was informative and interesting in a unique way. And the writing is excellent, even though I questioned some of the storytelling choices. If you can handle a raw look at this era of history from an angle like Trey's, MY GOVERNMENT MEANS TO KILL ME is definitely worth a read.
"The point is to let your bruised and bloodied bodies serve as evidence that the government means to kill you, if you so much as protest its bigoted policies."
"We are not so narrowly defined as society would have us believe. Yet the limits placed on our appetites, talents, and potential are implanted in us when we are children—too young to recognize the prisons built with words. We could blame it all on our families, but then we'd never find the keys to unlock our cells. The awful genius of our confinement is that we are both the prisoner and the warden. We tell ourselves daily that we aren't free to do this or do that because we are that or this. To escape such limited thinking, we don't have to look far. The keys are in our pocket."
"Robber barons, political overlords, and other powerful devils can reign with impunity for decades, and the terror they inflict on those of us beneath them can feel eternal. Yet there is one stone that will slay them all: time. Devils grow old, and the world around them eventually exceeds their understanding and control. Never forget that. Never let them forget it."
The main character, 18-year-old Trey, is trying to find his way in the city after intentionally estranging from his wealthy parents. A few things he's faced with include housing woes (and even a rent strike), grief over his brother's death during his childhood, and, perhaps most notably, the US government's deliberate inaction during the AIDS crisis.
MY GOVERNMENT MEANS TO KILL ME is a hard-hitting story with plenty of conflict and intrigue. There was always something happening in this story, so it kept my attention even though it was a little all over the place. It covered a lot—maybe too much, considering how short the book is. It's dramatic, educational, sexy, funny, and challenging. It won't be a book for every reader for many reasons, including the descriptive language around sex and drugs that some might find unbearably crude. However, given the reality of a person like Trey's life, a type of person who has absolutely existed throughout history, the content is honest and accurate.
My biggest gripe with this book intersects with my favorite thing about it. It's heavy on historical references and even uses real people (historical figures) as characters in the story. I questioned the ethics of that and the speculation and stereotyping it opens those figures up to. Real people, such as Dorothy Cotton, Larry Kramer, James Baldwin, Bayard Rustin (who played a major part in the story and is depicted as a frequent bathhouse patron), and many others, are characters in this novel. We don't know how much of their characterization is accurate and I've seen some reviewers call out some of it for being a misrepresentation of the person's life and activism. If I had led a significant life and someone wrote me into their novel having fictional sex in scenarios I might've never been in or saying things I might not have co-signed, I'd be pissed from the grave.
On the other hand, I learned a lot from this book because of the historical references and frequent footnotes about them. I love my career as a writer, but reading about Trey's burgeoning activism was exciting and made me long for my college dream of being a civil rights lawyer. A lot happened very quickly in this book, and it was informative and interesting in a unique way. And the writing is excellent, even though I questioned some of the storytelling choices. If you can handle a raw look at this era of history from an angle like Trey's, MY GOVERNMENT MEANS TO KILL ME is definitely worth a read.
"The point is to let your bruised and bloodied bodies serve as evidence that the government means to kill you, if you so much as protest its bigoted policies."
"We are not so narrowly defined as society would have us believe. Yet the limits placed on our appetites, talents, and potential are implanted in us when we are children—too young to recognize the prisons built with words. We could blame it all on our families, but then we'd never find the keys to unlock our cells. The awful genius of our confinement is that we are both the prisoner and the warden. We tell ourselves daily that we aren't free to do this or do that because we are that or this. To escape such limited thinking, we don't have to look far. The keys are in our pocket."
"Robber barons, political overlords, and other powerful devils can reign with impunity for decades, and the terror they inflict on those of us beneath them can feel eternal. Yet there is one stone that will slay them all: time. Devils grow old, and the world around them eventually exceeds their understanding and control. Never forget that. Never let them forget it."
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racial slurs, Racism, Sexual content, Violence, Police brutality, and Pandemic/Epidemic
Moderate: Child death, Death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Homophobia, Grief, Murder, Lesbophobia, and Injury/Injury detail
wanderlust_romance's review against another edition
challenging
dark
funny
hopeful
informative
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
4.5
You should read this book. My Government Means to Kill Me was a darkly comedic, witty, insightful, sexy, reflective, and deviously smart coming of age story that follows Trey as he creates a new life for himself after moving from Indianapolis to New York City in the 80s. Trey grows as a character through all of his varied interactions and relationships in bathhouses and bougie parties, with his sex worker roommate, neighbors, activists, queer elders, amidst the backdrop of the AIDS epidemic. This was the first book I’ve read that directly and insightfully addressed how AIDS ravaged the LGBTQIA community while also emphasizing the importance of community care and activism. The title of the book initially appears in the first few chapters, but it takes on heightened meaning In “Lesson 12: Learn How to Take a Punch,” when ACT UP! volunteers are put through a test to determine who among them is ready to stand on the front lines of a planned direct action. It was perhaps the most meaningful and timely message I took away from the book.
“You must remember that your victory comes from unmasking the senseless brutality that the government chooses to sanction against you, a collection of nonviolent demonstrators. The point is to let your bruised and bloodied bodies serve as evidence that the government means to kill you, if you so much as protest its bigoted policies.”
Content Warnings
Moderate: Child death, Death, Drug use, Homophobia, Racial slurs, Racism, Terminal illness, Violence, Police brutality, Grief, and Injury/Injury detail