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ciuli's review
1.0
1/5
No. Absolutely no. This book sucked. The writing style, the characters, everything made me want to cut my eyeballs.
I'm not usually one to give books such low ratings or bad revirws, but there is not even one single thing I liked about it.
The writing style was just a huge NO for me. It's childish, underdeveloped and rushed. Plus, I get that the author wants to give us the idea of 'poor Noah, nothing goes right for him, and when you think things can't get worse they actually do', but there is a thing as too much. First it was his best friend being gay and having feelings for him, then his mother being a bitch, then we found it he has a sibling he didn't know about, then the pregnancy,then his father being a scumbag and so on and so on. Just stop. I think the idea for this plot was cute and nice, the idea of a teenager who doesn't really have a place he can call home, who suddenly finds out that his best friend is gay and has feelings for him, the whole thing making him even more insecure about himself and the need to find out who he really is. But there is just too much drama and not even welldeveloped!
Let's talk about the characters. Because maybe there was a chance that the characters could have saved the book but no, this is not the case.
We have Noah, our protagonist who is a very naive and kind of annoying 15-year-old, who has been bullied for ages due to some unfortunate things that happened in his past and, living in a small town, everyone knows about them.
There is Sophie, but I still don't get why she was there in the first place. She is useless. Like, she gets introduced and then 3 days later she moves to another city and that's it. I mean, what was the point of her character.
And then there is Harry. Young nice Harry. Do you want to know which character I loathed the most throughout the whole book? Even more than Noah's parents? Well, that award goes to Harry. I hated him so much I don't even know how to properly explain my hate for him. He claims to be this good person he just really is not. He kisses Noah and tells him his feelings out of nowhere and he just expects Noah to suddenly understand the meaning of life and be okay with it, and love him just as much as he loves him. But when Noah admits that he doesn't really know what he feels, he can't stand it. Noah just asked him for time to think about it, but he kept pushing and pushing, like it was his right to be liked back by Noah. he himself admits that, of course, he had time to think about it and realize that he was gay, but he doesn't give Noah even one day to think about it himself. And he KNOWS how naive Noah is, and that he probably never thought about his sexuality in the first place.
When Noah accepts Eric's blackmail and buys the video I was so upset that Harry reacted that way. I mean, I understand his pov, he's saying "you just bought it because you don't want people to know you're gay, and you're ashame of me". I get it. But he didn't even stop to think that Noah, not even being sure of his sexuality, maybe wanted to make that sure before having even more rumours spreading about it.
And when Noah goes to him the first time asking for help after their discussion, and he just turns away from him, that was really bullshit. I get that your feelings are hurt, but he is still supposed to be your best friend. And he just turns his back on him. It's like he's saying 'either you like me or I won't help you anymore'. That was his shittiest moment imo.
Anyway, sorry for the long babbling, but I had to express my feelings about this book.
If you're looking for a nice gay romance, don't read this book.
No. Absolutely no. This book sucked. The writing style, the characters, everything made me want to cut my eyeballs.
I'm not usually one to give books such low ratings or bad revirws, but there is not even one single thing I liked about it.
The writing style was just a huge NO for me. It's childish, underdeveloped and rushed. Plus, I get that the author wants to give us the idea of 'poor Noah, nothing goes right for him, and when you think things can't get worse they actually do', but there is a thing as too much. First it was his best friend being gay and having feelings for him, then his mother being a bitch, then we found it he has a sibling he didn't know about, then the pregnancy,then his father being a scumbag and so on and so on. Just stop. I think the idea for this plot was cute and nice, the idea of a teenager who doesn't really have a place he can call home, who suddenly finds out that his best friend is gay and has feelings for him, the whole thing making him even more insecure about himself and the need to find out who he really is. But there is just too much drama and not even welldeveloped!
Let's talk about the characters. Because maybe there was a chance that the characters could have saved the book but no, this is not the case.
We have Noah, our protagonist who is a very naive and kind of annoying 15-year-old, who has been bullied for ages due to some unfortunate things that happened in his past and, living in a small town, everyone knows about them.
There is Sophie, but I still don't get why she was there in the first place. She is useless. Like, she gets introduced and then 3 days later she moves to another city and that's it. I mean, what was the point of her character.
And then there is Harry. Young nice Harry. Do you want to know which character I loathed the most throughout the whole book? Even more than Noah's parents? Well, that award goes to Harry. I hated him so much I don't even know how to properly explain my hate for him. He claims to be this good person he just really is not. He kisses Noah and tells him his feelings out of nowhere and he just expects Noah to suddenly understand the meaning of life and be okay with it, and love him just as much as he loves him. But when Noah admits that he doesn't really know what he feels, he can't stand it. Noah just asked him for time to think about it, but he kept pushing and pushing, like it was his right to be liked back by Noah. he himself admits that, of course, he had time to think about it and realize that he was gay, but he doesn't give Noah even one day to think about it himself. And he KNOWS how naive Noah is, and that he probably never thought about his sexuality in the first place.
When Noah accepts Eric's blackmail and buys the video I was so upset that Harry reacted that way. I mean, I understand his pov, he's saying "you just bought it because you don't want people to know you're gay, and you're ashame of me". I get it. But he didn't even stop to think that Noah, not even being sure of his sexuality, maybe wanted to make that sure before having even more rumours spreading about it.
And when Noah goes to him the first time asking for help after their discussion, and he just turns away from him, that was really bullshit. I get that your feelings are hurt, but he is still supposed to be your best friend. And he just turns his back on him. It's like he's saying 'either you like me or I won't help you anymore'. That was his shittiest moment imo.
Anyway, sorry for the long babbling, but I had to express my feelings about this book.
If you're looking for a nice gay romance, don't read this book.
cook1ebeans's review
funny
hopeful
inspiring
lighthearted
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
gracieellen's review
emotional
funny
mysterious
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
matthiasdj's review
3.0
It's... okay.
It was a bit hard to get in the story, I just didn't really feel it. The story itself was fine, but sometimes it was a bit confusing. I really loved Harry and Sophie but the other characters were a bit too much for me.
2.5/5 stars.
It was a bit hard to get in the story, I just didn't really feel it. The story itself was fine, but sometimes it was a bit confusing. I really loved Harry and Sophie but the other characters were a bit too much for me.
2.5/5 stars.
kaikai1618's review
3.7 stars? How was this kinda bad that it was then really good? This book was enjoyable for me. It actually made me laugh, snorting at the ridiculousness of some stuff in this book.
It's so weird because sometimes Noah was so dumb to the point where at multiple times I just dropped my kindle because it was so stupid.
But also other times the idiotic stuff that he said is what made me laugh! I was at a sleepover reading this, and it was amusing and funny so I was reading until 5am. Time flew by and I was snorting involuntary in the silence. It's like oh well this doesn't seem that great, but it still worked and not many books make me laugh so??? I have no idea what to think because maybe what I would have changed is the stuff that I think was a little too far in how much a human can mess up with what they say, but humans are weird this could totally be happening somewhere.
But if you don't find it enjoyable that something is kinda dumb or far fetched this book may not be for you. Because it made me laugh and it was interesting and charming somehow so I stayed, but I can see why people would really not like this book.
I mean it gets to the point where I've reached my embarrassment empathy capacity because he gets himself into these situations where you just go AGHHHHH and get this cringing feeling because it's just so embarrassing.
I'm not sure if this book was overdoing it or not.
I feel like it's the kind of thing where it's so bad that it's good. Because the situations were major face palms with how Noah handled everything. It was so frustrating but then it was just so hilarious while being horrible.
But this book has been a real fun book to read and has probably been one of the books that made me laugh the most. The cringy moments were very purposeful so I STILL DONT KNOW.
Wait I have to mention the grandma. The grandma is one of my favorite characters. She was hilarious just the way she spoke and used teen language was so amazing.
I mean I actually like this book more than most of Winger. Everyone loves Winger and it's so weird because I didn't enjoy the narrative as much as I wanted to. It was still a good book but sometimes the vulgar language just got in the way and wasn't enjoyable for me. This author used a lot of cussing and what would be considered vulgar language but in this book it was pulled off so well. It added to the humor in the story and I think it was also the innocence of Noah who knew what this stuff was, but was had no experience with it. It happens a lot but was just still so enjoyable.
(SPOILER COMMENT-- so here's the thing though. Noah is smart. He's geeky and VERY sociallY awkward but even though he does really dumb stuff all the time, his dad was asking for all this stuff, and Noah knew that his dad was doing stuff just like him when he lies. In some books the son or daughter would think nothing is wrong and that their parent is finally home when they are so obviously being scammed. Noah knew and didn't completely fall for it. Not very smart...I don't know about that because even if he has good grades he still hid his das in the shed, was an idiotic asshole when it came to Harry( though understandably), and thought Josh Lewis was a good friend when he just WASN'T and we all knew that.
(STILL SPOILER)
Things I would have changed but I'm sill not sure if this would have made me laugh less:
-Certain things not being so over the top, but still ridiculous cause that's part of the book's charm.
-More Harry because he was amazing and we didn't get to see too much of him. If we have a crazy narrator, we need the more normal and stable characters to balance everything out. We have Noah's crazy thoughts and when Harry is around at least we have someone normal and the situation is more mellow before it blows up in Noah's face again from his drama.
- the end was good for this book, but the way that Noah had suddenly come to terms with liking Harry--okay that's fine--but when he said he loved him....I'm not so sure about that.)
END OF SPOILER
So from this review you should probably get. A very conflicting book that is charmingly ridiculous but light hearted and not for everyone but can capture your heart.
It's so weird because sometimes Noah was so dumb to the point where at multiple times I just dropped my kindle because it was so stupid.
But also other times the idiotic stuff that he said is what made me laugh! I was at a sleepover reading this, and it was amusing and funny so I was reading until 5am. Time flew by and I was snorting involuntary in the silence. It's like oh well this doesn't seem that great, but it still worked and not many books make me laugh so??? I have no idea what to think because maybe what I would have changed is the stuff that I think was a little too far in how much a human can mess up with what they say, but humans are weird this could totally be happening somewhere.
But if you don't find it enjoyable that something is kinda dumb or far fetched this book may not be for you. Because it made me laugh and it was interesting and charming somehow so I stayed, but I can see why people would really not like this book.
I mean it gets to the point where I've reached my embarrassment empathy capacity because he gets himself into these situations where you just go AGHHHHH and get this cringing feeling because it's just so embarrassing.
I'm not sure if this book was overdoing it or not.
I feel like it's the kind of thing where it's so bad that it's good. Because the situations were major face palms with how Noah handled everything. It was so frustrating but then it was just so hilarious while being horrible.
But this book has been a real fun book to read and has probably been one of the books that made me laugh the most. The cringy moments were very purposeful so I STILL DONT KNOW.
Wait I have to mention the grandma. The grandma is one of my favorite characters. She was hilarious just the way she spoke and used teen language was so amazing.
I mean I actually like this book more than most of Winger. Everyone loves Winger and it's so weird because I didn't enjoy the narrative as much as I wanted to. It was still a good book but sometimes the vulgar language just got in the way and wasn't enjoyable for me. This author used a lot of cussing and what would be considered vulgar language but in this book it was pulled off so well. It added to the humor in the story and I think it was also the innocence of Noah who knew what this stuff was, but was had no experience with it. It happens a lot but was just still so enjoyable.
(SPOILER COMMENT-- so here's the thing though. Noah is smart. He's geeky and VERY sociallY awkward but even though he does really dumb stuff all the time, his dad was asking for all this stuff, and Noah knew that his dad was doing stuff just like him when he lies. In some books the son or daughter would think nothing is wrong and that their parent is finally home when they are so obviously being scammed. Noah knew and didn't completely fall for it. Not very smart...I don't know about that because even if he has good grades he still hid his das in the shed, was an idiotic asshole when it came to Harry( though understandably), and thought Josh Lewis was a good friend when he just WASN'T and we all knew that.
(STILL SPOILER)
Things I would have changed but I'm sill not sure if this would have made me laugh less:
-Certain things not being so over the top, but still ridiculous cause that's part of the book's charm.
-More Harry because he was amazing and we didn't get to see too much of him. If we have a crazy narrator, we need the more normal and stable characters to balance everything out. We have Noah's crazy thoughts and when Harry is around at least we have someone normal and the situation is more mellow before it blows up in Noah's face again from his drama.
- the end was good for this book, but the way that Noah had suddenly come to terms with liking Harry--okay that's fine--but when he said he loved him....I'm not so sure about that.)
END OF SPOILER
So from this review you should probably get. A very conflicting book that is charmingly ridiculous but light hearted and not for everyone but can capture your heart.
apinkcloudsummer's review
1.0
I really, really, really hate saying rude things about a novel where I know the author put a lot of their love into... but in all honesty it wasn't good.
I should've stopped at the first chapter, Noah did not seem like a 15 year old, I mean he fucking drank alcohol but acted like he was 9. I thought at some point he would mature but he never really did.
There was so much going on, i mean sometimes a lot of interesting events happening pulls you in more, but this was just too much. The story was all over the place. I just kept reading because of Harry, he was just the only one who felt like they could actually be a real person. Even Connor! Who basically had two lines in this book!
I should've stopped at the first chapter, Noah did not seem like a 15 year old, I mean he fucking drank alcohol but acted like he was 9. I thought at some point he would mature but he never really did.
There was so much going on, i mean sometimes a lot of interesting events happening pulls you in more, but this was just too much. The story was all over the place. I just kept reading because of Harry, he was just the only one who felt like they could actually be a real person. Even Connor! Who basically had two lines in this book!
drakoulis's review
5.0
A hilarious and wholesome book, that will make you smile all the time!
Noah is a disaster gay (in denial), a geeky teenager who has to deal with an irresponsible mother and come to terms with himself.
Harry is an absolute cinnamon roll and their relatiosnhip with its ups and downs and all the ridiculousness is adorable!
Noah is a disaster gay (in denial), a geeky teenager who has to deal with an irresponsible mother and come to terms with himself.
Harry is an absolute cinnamon roll and their relatiosnhip with its ups and downs and all the ridiculousness is adorable!
bethanychristou's review
4.0
Being a teenager is confusing enough as it is – but poor Noah has it worse than most. He already stands out at school with a missing dad, and a mum who does an embarrassing Beyoncé tribute act. But now his sexuality is put under question when his best friend Harry suddenly kisses him.
Noah is the most awkward, cringe-worthy character I’ve ever encountered. He can’t help but dig himself into a hole by completely misjudging social situations and people’s intentions – all while spouting the most hilarious dialogue. If it were real life, I’d probably be watching through my fingers in a kind of mortified horror.
Simon James Green has really nailed the whole panicky, over-dramatic, insecure teenage ‘voice’. The tone of the book is comical, but also has its heart-warming moments. Sometimes the situations became so ridiculous and OTT that they were borderline unbelievable. Overall it made for an entertaining read.
Noah is the most awkward, cringe-worthy character I’ve ever encountered. He can’t help but dig himself into a hole by completely misjudging social situations and people’s intentions – all while spouting the most hilarious dialogue. If it were real life, I’d probably be watching through my fingers in a kind of mortified horror.
Simon James Green has really nailed the whole panicky, over-dramatic, insecure teenage ‘voice’. The tone of the book is comical, but also has its heart-warming moments. Sometimes the situations became so ridiculous and OTT that they were borderline unbelievable. Overall it made for an entertaining read.
achilleanshelves's review
3.0
Noah Can't Even by Simon James Green is a young-adult contemporary novel told from the third-person POV of Noah Grimes a fifteen-year-old who literally never has anything good happen to him. It follows Noah as he navigates familial issues, bullies at school and his best-friend Harry coming out to him as gay.
Noah is extremely annoying as a central voice. Rather than awkward, he comes across as obnoxious and self-centred and never once thinks about the feelings of other characters. This book is marketed as Noah navigating his sexuality after Harry kisses him, however, the majority of the book is just Noah voicing his internalised homophobia and not confronting any of his feelings until he forced to do so.
However, this book, in all its ridiculousness, is exactly the kind of read I needed during this period of self-isolation and I am grateful to it for that. I will be reading the sequel, for sure.
Noah is extremely annoying as a central voice. Rather than awkward, he comes across as obnoxious and self-centred and never once thinks about the feelings of other characters. This book is marketed as Noah navigating his sexuality after Harry kisses him, however, the majority of the book is just Noah voicing his internalised homophobia and not confronting any of his feelings until he forced to do so.
However, this book, in all its ridiculousness, is exactly the kind of read I needed during this period of self-isolation and I am grateful to it for that. I will be reading the sequel, for sure.