Reviews

In the forward by Jhumpa Lahiri, she writes “Prohibited….It is the word De Céspedes chooses to describe Valeria's notebook…a woman's right, in post-war Italy, to express herself in writing, to have a voice, and to hold opinions and secrets that distinguish herself from her family.”

Valeria, called Mamma by her family, buys the notebook in the tobacco shop. She had no previous plans to make the purchase and afterwards was not sure what she would do with it.
“They all…began laughing at the idea that I might keep a diary. ‘What would you write, mamma?’ said Michele…Serious, then, Ricardo got up and came over to me.
‘Mamma is right,’ he said gravely, ‘she, too, has the right to keep…a secret diary.’
Riccardo, taking my chin in his fingers, asked tenderly, ‘Tell me, what do you want to write in your diary?’ Suddenly, I burst into tears. I didn't understand what was wrong with me, except a great weariness….”

Valeria hides the notebook, writing secretly in it at night.
“Even a maid who works all day without stopping says, ‘Good night,’ and has the right to shut herself in a room, in a pantry. I'd be content with a pantry.”

Valeria records the major events of her life and her feelings concerning them: the problems in her marriage, disagreements over the choices of her adult children, and the changes in her relationship with her employer. The journal entries track the gradual changes and down right inconsistencies in her sentiments and actions. She tries to explain to herself and decide what her own views are on the momental changes happening in the society around her: the changing roles of women and mothers, the importance of an education and work outside the home, and the right to seek one’s own happiness at the cost of others. Unlike her daughter Marina, Valeria finally concludes that she was unable to act in her own self-interest due to her inability to leave behind learned religious teachings and past societal norms.
“Basically, I want to confess, what I won't love in Marina is her age, her youth, her right to make mistakes, to be incompetent. I would insist that she be like women of my age, although to make women like that takes, precisely, the years they've lived. It's unfair….”