thesimplelibrary's review against another edition
3.0
Elizabeth Kim writes her memoir of a Korean orphan in a poetic, yet accessible way. From her earliest memories as an illegitimate child of a Korean peasant and American GI, to her childhood as an adopted child of two fundamentalist Christians and her account of struggles as a single mother, Kim meticulously captures her feelings of loneliness and abandonment.
The inclusion of her own poetry is a wonderful extension to the harrowing atmosphere, as are the written observations from Leigh, her own daughter. Elizabeth Kim has powers of observation and introspection, and a good understanding of her heritage and the implications it has brought her.
A trauma memoir, a category which, i.a., this autobiography falls under, is never an easy read, and "Ten Thousand Sorrows" is no exception to the case. It is an emotional tale that covers themes of survival, violence, abuse, and healing, and it is not recommended for the faint-hearted among us.
The reason for giving a 3 star rating is my own dislike of her repetitive thoughts. I felt that each chapter ended in the same, rather pessimistic tone, something similar to what Kim tells us in chapter fifteen : "everything we have vanishes someday. If love were to arrive, the knowledge that someday it would leave would be devastating". This tone is partly set of course because of Kim's inability to heal throughout the majority of the book, as her healing process only seems to starts and end in the few last chapters.
Nonetheless, it is a highly interesting and good read, and recommended to those who are interested in immigrant and trauma memoir.
The inclusion of her own poetry is a wonderful extension to the harrowing atmosphere, as are the written observations from Leigh, her own daughter. Elizabeth Kim has powers of observation and introspection, and a good understanding of her heritage and the implications it has brought her.
A trauma memoir, a category which, i.a., this autobiography falls under, is never an easy read, and "Ten Thousand Sorrows" is no exception to the case. It is an emotional tale that covers themes of survival, violence, abuse, and healing, and it is not recommended for the faint-hearted among us.
The reason for giving a 3 star rating is my own dislike of her repetitive thoughts. I felt that each chapter ended in the same, rather pessimistic tone, something similar to what Kim tells us in chapter fifteen : "everything we have vanishes someday. If love were to arrive, the knowledge that someday it would leave would be devastating". This tone is partly set of course because of Kim's inability to heal throughout the majority of the book, as her healing process only seems to starts and end in the few last chapters.
Nonetheless, it is a highly interesting and good read, and recommended to those who are interested in immigrant and trauma memoir.
rachjy's review against another edition
emotional
inspiring
reflective
sad
tense
fast-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Moderate: Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Abandonment, Racial slurs, Emotional abuse, Gaslighting, Pregnancy, Self harm, Sexual violence, Death of parent, Infidelity, Physical abuse, Racism, Rape, Religious bigotry, Vomit, Murder, and Violence
liralen's review against another edition
3.0
In Ten Thousand Sorrows, Kim chronicles one sorrow after another: the murder of her mother in a so-called honour killing in Korea; the alienation she felt in her adopted country, the US; the beatings and indignities her fundamentalist Christian adoptive parents bestowed upon her for failing to bend enough to their interpretation of Christianity; the physical abuse she faced at the hands of the husband those same parents chose for her.
Kim's writing is at its best when showing the reader the actions of the people around her and letting the reader draw conclusions. Unfortunately, as often as not, the actions come with a hefty side of biting descriptions when the narrative might be better served by deeper digging into who people were and why—not to tell 'their side' of the story but to round out the story. I'm not sure how much of her memories of her Korean mother are fact and how much of them are a child's fuzziness mixed with an adult's educated guesses (Kim's mother died when she was five or six, and any chance of family contact died with her), but I'd have been interested in seeing more discussion of that: of what Kim has tried, or not tried, to find out and why; of the reliability of a child's memories (I mean this as less doubtful than it might sound—just that it would be an interesting thing to discuss); of whether she remembers any good moments with her adoptive parents and whether visiting Korea again was ever in the cards and so on.
Kim's writing is at its best when showing the reader the actions of the people around her and letting the reader draw conclusions. Unfortunately, as often as not, the actions come with a hefty side of biting descriptions when the narrative might be better served by deeper digging into who people were and why—not to tell 'their side' of the story but to round out the story. I'm not sure how much of her memories of her Korean mother are fact and how much of them are a child's fuzziness mixed with an adult's educated guesses (Kim's mother died when she was five or six, and any chance of family contact died with her), but I'd have been interested in seeing more discussion of that: of what Kim has tried, or not tried, to find out and why; of the reliability of a child's memories (I mean this as less doubtful than it might sound—just that it would be an interesting thing to discuss); of whether she remembers any good moments with her adoptive parents and whether visiting Korea again was ever in the cards and so on.
kingfan30's review against another edition
3.0
I’m in two minds about this book. There is no denying it’s a terrible story, to witness an honour killing and then go on to be adopted by a very odd couple, however I couldn’t help question how she could remember so much of her early life with her birth mother when it comes across that she was very young when it happened. I also question when this all occurred as there is no indication as to what year, and yet when she arrives in America to live with her adoptive parents, she talks about the segregation of the races so it appears to be some time ago and may explain, what I can only call, the strange behaviour of her new family. And there’s so much early life and seemed to rush though her later life.
kalkie's review against another edition
3.0
This is an interesting little book, detailing the life of "Elizabeth" Kim, born to a Korean mother and American GI father. Brandished a honhyol (a "non-person") because of her mixed race, her early life was filled with jeers and abuse from the other villagers where Elizabeth and her mother lived in relative isolation. When she was a young girl, her mother was killed by her father and brother in an "honour killing" for bringing shame on the family. Elizabeth escaped a life of slavery and was instead sent to an orphanage in Seoul.
The orphanage, run by missionaries, was in an appalling state of repair, and the children spent most of their days in "cages" lined along the edges of the main room of the orphanage. There was lttle food, and no love shown to the children living there. When she was about 6 years old, "Elizabeth"" (as no-one knew her real name, this was a given name) was adopted by an American couple who were christian fundamentalists, and was taken to live in the American West.
This book thus follows a life of abuse meted out with the name of god, and Elizabeth's subsequent abusive marriage and escape into relative freedom.
However traumatic the tale in this book is, unfortunately it is not one I haven't heard before. With the recent rise in "childhood abuse" memoirs such as Dave Pelzer's A Boy Called "It" or Julie Gregory's Sickened, it is a genre which all too readily pulls at the heart strings. That said, I was also incredibly angry in places with Elizabeth's behaviour. She was so "accepting" of her parents' behaviour, even when she was an adult she didn't rebel against them. And her treatment of her own daughter made me so angry. She clearly cannot see that the emotional pressure she put on her own daughter - making a "pact" that she wouldn't kill herself until her daughter was a teenager - is tantamount to the same level of emotional abuse her own parents put her through.
I found this a book of emotional highs and lows, and while there wasn't a nice neat "conclusion" or "answer" at the end of the book - probably because Kim herself hasn't reached her own conclusions on what has happened - I did find it an interesting and engaging book to read.
The orphanage, run by missionaries, was in an appalling state of repair, and the children spent most of their days in "cages" lined along the edges of the main room of the orphanage. There was lttle food, and no love shown to the children living there. When she was about 6 years old, "Elizabeth"" (as no-one knew her real name, this was a given name) was adopted by an American couple who were christian fundamentalists, and was taken to live in the American West.
This book thus follows a life of abuse meted out with the name of god, and Elizabeth's subsequent abusive marriage and escape into relative freedom.
However traumatic the tale in this book is, unfortunately it is not one I haven't heard before. With the recent rise in "childhood abuse" memoirs such as Dave Pelzer's A Boy Called "It" or Julie Gregory's Sickened, it is a genre which all too readily pulls at the heart strings. That said, I was also incredibly angry in places with Elizabeth's behaviour. She was so "accepting" of her parents' behaviour, even when she was an adult she didn't rebel against them. And her treatment of her own daughter made me so angry. She clearly cannot see that the emotional pressure she put on her own daughter - making a "pact" that she wouldn't kill herself until her daughter was a teenager - is tantamount to the same level of emotional abuse her own parents put her through.
I found this a book of emotional highs and lows, and while there wasn't a nice neat "conclusion" or "answer" at the end of the book - probably because Kim herself hasn't reached her own conclusions on what has happened - I did find it an interesting and engaging book to read.
willowfae's review against another edition
4.0
This was an inspirational story of a child overcoming tragedy and growing into a woman with a child of her own. The events of her life in Korea have long reaching consequences on the way she views herself and others around her. At the end we learn how she has learnt to move on and reconcile herself with what happened to her.
eve81's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
fast-paced
4.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Colonisation, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexual violence, Slavery, Violence, Vomit, Child abuse, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Self harm, Blood, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Racial slurs, Rape, Religious bigotry, Sexual assault, and Torture
pikalexi's review against another edition
4.0
Fantastic. One of the best memoirs I've read - doesn't shirk from the pain but also doesn't give unnecessary details for the pleasure of the audience (as many memoirs expressing a childhood of abuse seem to do, and I find very difficult to read.) Raw and genuine, doesn't hide from the pain but doesn't revel in it - straightforward and touching. Great novel.