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david_slack110507's review against another edition
challenging
dark
emotional
hopeful
mysterious
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
I read this book for my A-Level English Literature coursework (as well as reading Wide Sargasso Sea for the coursework element of the course as well) and so I spent the majority of the summer putting nearly all of my reading motivation and progress into reading this book as well as annotating it and tabbing it which is much more than what I do for the other books I read and so hopefully explains the extra long time that the book took for me to read it especially because it is much shorter than my normal books.
In deeply analysing it, I feel like I have only enjoyed the book more because I really like this novel and that's quite shocking because while there is an initial plot of Lydia dying and the family trying to figure out how she died and once learning it was suicide, trying to figure out what drove her to that point and why, there isn't much plot outside of that and is almost entirely reliant on being driven by the characters at play. That's not a bad thing as the characters in the book are incredibly complex and interesting to read about, however, it's just not my usual style of a book as i usually have something plot focused or a mix between plot and character focus, but this didn't disappoint.
As I mentioned, the characters are all really complex and developed starting with the father, James, being ashamed of his Chinese identity and race all of his life, which has meant that all he has ever wanted is to fit in. At the same time, his wife, Marilyn has dreamed of becoming a doctor and standing out as a woman in at the time, a heavily male-dominated profession, but is unable to achieve these dreams as she soon becomes pregnant and has to focus on her family. These unfulfilled dreams of the parents are then pushed onto Lydia, their favourite daughter who they prioritise above everyone else in the family, yet she only wants to conform to what her parents want her to be to make them happy, particularly her mother, leaving Lydia without a fixed identity and having very few people who understand her and her situation. This favouritism then means that the other children, Nath, and in particular, Hannah are ignored not just by their parents but also by each other yet they are also their own characters as Nath is hellbent on escaping the family by going to Harvard despite it meaning that he'll have to leave his sister behind, whilst Hannah almost acts as an observer rather than a person, due to her noticing things when the other characters don't.
This creates a fascinating family dynamic that is explored in both the past, when Lydia was alive, and the present, following her death and we see how the family's attempt to appear normal begins to crack under the pressure and can't handle it anymore. The themes of expectations, belonging and alienation, race, gender roles, and secrets were all really interesting to see throughout the book and it felt like they were all handled really well and carefully too. I also really liked that, while we as the reader can infer why Lydia did what she did, even though it's never explicitly said, the characters are even more in the dark than us due to the divisions that were present in the family leading up to Lydia's death, and so never truly know what happened, giving a sense of reality and realism like so many cases have in which the families don't often get closure nor do they get all the details.
Overall, this was a really fun and interesting book to read that kept me constantly interested and I liked the variety of themes that it covered. The lack of a fixed ending but also having some optimism for the future worked as an ending that didn't cop out and have a happy ending as an easy solution to a really complex storyline and character dynamics.
In deeply analysing it, I feel like I have only enjoyed the book more because I really like this novel and that's quite shocking because while there is an initial plot of Lydia dying and the family trying to figure out how she died and once learning it was suicide, trying to figure out what drove her to that point and why, there isn't much plot outside of that and is almost entirely reliant on being driven by the characters at play. That's not a bad thing as the characters in the book are incredibly complex and interesting to read about, however, it's just not my usual style of a book as i usually have something plot focused or a mix between plot and character focus, but this didn't disappoint.
As I mentioned, the characters are all really complex and developed starting with the father, James, being ashamed of his Chinese identity and race all of his life, which has meant that all he has ever wanted is to fit in. At the same time, his wife, Marilyn has dreamed of becoming a doctor and standing out as a woman in at the time, a heavily male-dominated profession, but is unable to achieve these dreams as she soon becomes pregnant and has to focus on her family. These unfulfilled dreams of the parents are then pushed onto Lydia, their favourite daughter who they prioritise above everyone else in the family, yet she only wants to conform to what her parents want her to be to make them happy, particularly her mother, leaving Lydia without a fixed identity and having very few people who understand her and her situation. This favouritism then means that the other children, Nath, and in particular, Hannah are ignored not just by their parents but also by each other yet they are also their own characters as Nath is hellbent on escaping the family by going to Harvard despite it meaning that he'll have to leave his sister behind, whilst Hannah almost acts as an observer rather than a person, due to her noticing things when the other characters don't.
This creates a fascinating family dynamic that is explored in both the past, when Lydia was alive, and the present, following her death and we see how the family's attempt to appear normal begins to crack under the pressure and can't handle it anymore. The themes of expectations, belonging and alienation, race, gender roles, and secrets were all really interesting to see throughout the book and it felt like they were all handled really well and carefully too. I also really liked that, while we as the reader can infer why Lydia did what she did, even though it's never explicitly said, the characters are even more in the dark than us due to the divisions that were present in the family leading up to Lydia's death, and so never truly know what happened, giving a sense of reality and realism like so many cases have in which the families don't often get closure nor do they get all the details.
Overall, this was a really fun and interesting book to read that kept me constantly interested and I liked the variety of themes that it covered. The lack of a fixed ending but also having some optimism for the future worked as an ending that didn't cop out and have a happy ending as an easy solution to a really complex storyline and character dynamics.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Cursing, Death, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexism, Suicide, Violence, Grief, Suicide attempt, and Injury/Injury detail
Moderate: Child abuse, Confinement, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Sexual content, Toxic relationship, Xenophobia, Death of parent, Toxic friendship, and Injury/Injury detail
Minor: Bullying, Homophobia, Rape, Vomit, Stalking, Cultural appropriation, Alcohol, and Classism
mackc13's review against another edition
emotional
mysterious
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Tragically ripped my heart out and then tenderly tried to put it back.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Racial slurs, Racism, Xenophobia, and Grief
Moderate: Injury/Injury detail
beatle426's review against another edition
fast-paced
4.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Bullying, Child death, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Xenophobia, and Abandonment
hoodsicle's review against another edition
dark
emotional
hopeful
mysterious
reflective
sad
tense
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Everything I Never Told You is expertly written, brilliantly developed, and lovingly conceived. Exploring notions of grief, identity, race, love, expectation, and the duty we have both to ourselves and to our families, this novel explores the complex and layered issues that surprised the Lee family after the unexpected death of their middle child, Lydia. This book is not only riveting by way of plot, but creates a cast of characters so complex and so intimately crafted that the reader has no choice but to come to love them as their own, understand their feelings as though a dear friend, and feel deep, personal investment in their journeys throughout the story. A gut-wrenching ode to family, to love, and to the difficult but necessary duties we have toward ourselves, Celeste Ng's book is one for the ages.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Infidelity, Misogyny, Racism, Xenophobia, and Grief
im_just_vidu's review against another edition
dark
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? No
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Here I am grieving for the life that Lydia could never lived up to. Here I am loss of words because of how heart wrenching this was.
The first line of the book is "Lydia is dead. They don't know this yet" & you would think it's such an obvious thing, so you wouldn't cry over this book. Bold of me to assume the same cuz I did not expect THAT at all. I thought this would be end up being a murder mystery, but instead it just pulled all the heart strings of mine & made me feel so heartbroken. Maybe being relatable to the characters & their situations made things way worse. At the end, I didn't get the ending I wanted. I didn't get the answers for the questions I had. Most of the things I expected didn't end up happening. But that was the beautiful thing about this. Because life is like that. Life doesn't gives you the perfect ending & the closure to everything. Most of the time we just end up with bunch of questions we don't even know what to do with. I love that. It makes this story feel so close to the heart. I didn't cry yet but my heart feels so heavy so I might end up crying after finish writing this. Who knows? However read the trigger warnings & be prepared with a tissue box beforehand.
The first line of the book is "Lydia is dead. They don't know this yet" & you would think it's such an obvious thing, so you wouldn't cry over this book. Bold of me to assume the same cuz I did not expect THAT at all. I thought this would be end up being a murder mystery, but instead it just pulled all the heart strings of mine & made me feel so heartbroken. Maybe being relatable to the characters & their situations made things way worse. At the end, I didn't get the ending I wanted. I didn't get the answers for the questions I had. Most of the things I expected didn't end up happening. But that was the beautiful thing about this. Because life is like that. Life doesn't gives you the perfect ending & the closure to everything. Most of the time we just end up with bunch of questions we don't even know what to do with. I love that. It makes this story feel so close to the heart. I didn't cry yet but my heart feels so heavy so I might end up crying after finish writing this. Who knows? However read the trigger warnings & be prepared with a tissue box beforehand.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Death, Xenophobia, and Grief
Moderate: Bullying, Cursing, Emotional abuse, Sexism, Suicidal thoughts, and Cultural appropriation
Minor: Death of parent
Novelmbattiest's review against another edition
dark
emotional
mysterious
tense
fast-paced
3.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Racism, Toxic relationship, and Xenophobia
Moderate: Death and Racial slurs
mangofraiche's review against another edition
dark
emotional
mysterious
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Child death, Death, Infidelity, Racism, Xenophobia, and Grief
vaykay's review against another edition
adventurous
emotional
mysterious
fast-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Child death, Death, Domestic abuse, Emotional abuse, Hate crime, Infidelity, Physical abuse, Racial slurs, Racism, Sexual content, Xenophobia, Blood, Medical content, Grief, Death of parent, Pregnancy, Abandonment, Alcohol, and Injury/Injury detail
Minor: Rape, Suicide, Murder, and Outing
katyadaniela's review against another edition
dark
emotional
inspiring
mysterious
reflective
relaxing
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
I loved this book from beginning to end, Celeste Ng really knows how to put words on a page and paint a picture of a small town family with real struggles. Even if you can't personally relate to the characters, they are written in such a way that makes you love and hate them at the same time.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Racial slurs, Racism, and Xenophobia
Moderate: Death, Emotional abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Grief, and Abandonment
svtephreads's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.5
I cried unexpectedly many times
Content Warnings
Moderate: Child death, Death, Suicide, Xenophobia, and Death of parent