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crabbygirl's review
3.0
[guessing at the star rating / mining my old FB notes now that they are almost impossible to find]
manners are more important than laws. or at least we are more affected by these small indignities (or acts of grace if it goes the other way) than what we are or aren't allowed - legally - to do. so with that in mind, here are some mannerly things either i plan to employ:
* never lower the communication tools used, as in: don't reply to a phone call with an email, or reply to an email with a FB post. however, it is ok to go up a step
* shushing someone is louder than their actual noise, so bring a penlight to shine on the offending yacker in the movie theatre to get a quick & quiet response
* don't ask someone where they are staying when they mention travel. they might be embarrassed to admit their 'value' choice so asking which neighborhood gives you helpful information without putting their bank account on the spot
* it's ok, and even recommended, to make a list of conversation topics in advance of a party where you know few people. also, being on the receiving end of questions is fine, but you should make an effort too and inquire things of your conversation partner
* at a dinner party, it's rude to talk about any food that is not the food in front of you
* japanese toilets are chockfull of buttons: one for bidet feature, one for warming the seat, one for air drying, and even one for a flushing sound to mask embarrassing noises (ok, i don't plan to employ that one but it was interesting to learn)
i enjoyed the heavy sprinkling of humor in this book, such as when the author decides to answer the miss manners column without actually sending the replies, or when he volunteers to be a manners mentor for his FB friends (6 took him up on the offer). he also come up with a great way to get an older woman to stop wearing (and displaying) her thong by implying the grossest person they knew was defending her choice and said how he loved how 'hip, raunchy,and always up for it' she looked :)
manners are more important than laws. or at least we are more affected by these small indignities (or acts of grace if it goes the other way) than what we are or aren't allowed - legally - to do. so with that in mind, here are some mannerly things either i plan to employ:
* never lower the communication tools used, as in: don't reply to a phone call with an email, or reply to an email with a FB post. however, it is ok to go up a step
* shushing someone is louder than their actual noise, so bring a penlight to shine on the offending yacker in the movie theatre to get a quick & quiet response
* don't ask someone where they are staying when they mention travel. they might be embarrassed to admit their 'value' choice so asking which neighborhood gives you helpful information without putting their bank account on the spot
* it's ok, and even recommended, to make a list of conversation topics in advance of a party where you know few people. also, being on the receiving end of questions is fine, but you should make an effort too and inquire things of your conversation partner
* at a dinner party, it's rude to talk about any food that is not the food in front of you
* japanese toilets are chockfull of buttons: one for bidet feature, one for warming the seat, one for air drying, and even one for a flushing sound to mask embarrassing noises (ok, i don't plan to employ that one but it was interesting to learn)
i enjoyed the heavy sprinkling of humor in this book, such as when the author decides to answer the miss manners column without actually sending the replies, or when he volunteers to be a manners mentor for his FB friends (6 took him up on the offer). he also come up with a great way to get an older woman to stop wearing (and displaying) her thong by implying the grossest person they knew was defending her choice and said how he loved how 'hip, raunchy,and always up for it' she looked :)
heather01602to60660's review
2.0
This was hard to rate - I *enjoyed* the book, but wouldn't recommend it, at least within its own genre. I don't know if the author even knows what this book was meant to be - was it a book *about* manners as a topic, was it an etiquette book giving hints on how to behave, was it a series of (admittedly often amusing) essays? I sure couldn't tell you.
At times, there were great moments in reading, and then at times I'd get to the end of a chapter and still not sure what the topic of said chapter was. (The cutesy chapter titles were little more than that - cutesy.)
I would enjoy speaking with Mr. Alford at a social gathering - he is quite witty and made me laugh out loud a few times while reading. However, I would not recommend him as an expert on manners based on this particular book.
At times, there were great moments in reading, and then at times I'd get to the end of a chapter and still not sure what the topic of said chapter was. (The cutesy chapter titles were little more than that - cutesy.)
I would enjoy speaking with Mr. Alford at a social gathering - he is quite witty and made me laugh out loud a few times while reading. However, I would not recommend him as an expert on manners based on this particular book.
sarahfett's review
3.0
I was expecting a modern take on the traditional manners rule books that I admit I enjoy reading, but this is actually more of a memoir of the author's quest to explore manners in our modern world. Since I was expecting a very orderly book, the scattered nature of this book wore on me.
mhall's review
3.0
Charming guy, similar to David Sedaris, which is not faint praise. But this is a cursory, haphazard, hit-or-miss look at the topic of etiquette. Although, really, how awesome and great is an etiquette guide that heaps praise on Dolly Parton for responding to people ogling her by smothering them with her chest?
stellardoc's review
3.0
Less of a guide and more of a commentary. Alford labels himself an "investigative humorist," and there's plenty of investigation here, but I wouldn't recommend it to someone who's looking for a good laugh.
mellyfish's review
5.0
I don't have great manners, as it turns out most people don't unless they were born and raised in Japan. This was culturally enlightening and uproariously funny. I want to have lunch with the author. Badly.
anjanette's review
4.0
This book isn't as funny as the title would lead you to believe, but it's much more informative than you would imagine. It's not a knee-slapper, but it is very witty.
zade's review
3.0
I didn’t love this book. It’s not a “Miss Manners”-type guide, more of a series of reflections on how modern manners have changed and what the point is of manners in the first place. Alford is engaging and seems like a neat fellow—the kind of guy you could go just about anywhere with and he’d make it fun. A lot of what he writes about, though, has little or no application in the lives of people outside the creative NYC scene. What really got me, what made me decide to give the book room on my shelf was this line:
Manners columns…reassure me and console me by suggesting that life’s ragged edges can be made smooth, that there’s never not an answer to even the most challenging question. They’re finite, and devoid of the hundreds of extenuating circumstances that make the solving of my own or my friends’ problems so complicated. (177)
Manners columns…reassure me and console me by suggesting that life’s ragged edges can be made smooth, that there’s never not an answer to even the most challenging question. They’re finite, and devoid of the hundreds of extenuating circumstances that make the solving of my own or my friends’ problems so complicated. (177)
k_char's review
Pulled from a little free library for some light reading and that’s what I got! No rating cause it was a fun read and not a serious endeavour. No solid feelings one way or another, multiple chuckles and multiple sections skimmed