writerbarbie's review
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death of parent and Cancer
Moderate: Addiction and Alcoholism
Minor: Abortion
ravenph's review
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
4.5
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death of parent
Moderate: Violence
Minor: Alcoholism and Racism
gracer's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
inspiring
reflective
sad
fast-paced
5.0
This is the rare book that entirely lives up to the hype that it has created.
Unfortunately for me, I read it on a kindle library book, and now I can't seem to access my notes anywhere. (Not through goodreads and not through the Libby app, I've read all the FAQs and questions, I swear.) Oh well. This is probably going to be a re-read at some point anyway.
This book is exceptional: Zauner writes about the tragic loss of her much-too-young mother and manages to strike a perfect tone. It isn't whiny or complainy. It isn't cold and distanced. It isn't overly indulgent. She seamlessly combines everything: memories of childhood visits to South Korea, where her mother is from; growing up Asian-American in the small city of Eugene; the sort of angst and frustration and rebelliousness that is often born of youth early adulthood; and the grave, bleak diagnosis of mother and her mother's subsequent treatment and care.
Furthermore, she does not shy away from the awful things -- terrible words members of the family sometimes said to each other, reasons she rebelled -- and then she does an exceptional job of showing the love of the family despite these things. She reminds us that families can sometimes cause any of us the most unbelievable pain, even the "best" ones. As I read this book, I thought that in many ways this would be a good book for a new parent to read, as an example of what not to do but also as a reminder that no one is perfect, that parents have been making mistakes for as long as there have been parents and not all parents are horrible for it.
She dances so gracefully around the complicated topic of her father, with whom she has a complicated and even resentful relationship. She addresses her issues but is at the same time very respectful, and all the while the book is dedicated completely to her mother - none of the father complications take a way from that, it is still only through the lens of her mother and her mother's death.
There is also so much food writing in this. I suppose that is somewhat implied by the title, but discreetly so, I would say, and nicely done. Be warned, you'll get hungry. But food is just another mediary through which Zauner navigates not only her identity and her relationship with her mother; it's also a reflection of her emotional changes throughout her mother's illness. It ties everything together.
When I started reading this book, I hadn't made it far before I found a line about growing up without a diaspora that really resonated with me. I wish I could find my notes and highlights now! I knew I was in for something good, and it just continued to be that. Even though it's such a tough and serious topic, it never dragged me down. I found this book so easy to read, like I just glided through it, stopping only to highlight striking phrases. Just beautiful. It lives up to the hype. I'm in awe of what Zauner did here. Read it.
Unfortunately for me, I read it on a kindle library book, and now I can't seem to access my notes anywhere. (Not through goodreads and not through the Libby app, I've read all the FAQs and questions, I swear.) Oh well. This is probably going to be a re-read at some point anyway.
This book is exceptional: Zauner writes about the tragic loss of her much-too-young mother and manages to strike a perfect tone. It isn't whiny or complainy. It isn't cold and distanced. It isn't overly indulgent. She seamlessly combines everything: memories of childhood visits to South Korea, where her mother is from; growing up Asian-American in the small city of Eugene; the sort of angst and frustration and rebelliousness that is often born of youth early adulthood; and the grave, bleak diagnosis of mother and her mother's subsequent treatment and care.
Furthermore, she does not shy away from the awful things -- terrible words members of the family sometimes said to each other, reasons she rebelled -- and then she does an exceptional job of showing the love of the family despite these things. She reminds us that families can sometimes cause any of us the most unbelievable pain, even the "best" ones. As I read this book, I thought that in many ways this would be a good book for a new parent to read, as an example of what not to do but also as a reminder that no one is perfect, that parents have been making mistakes for as long as there have been parents and not all parents are horrible for it.
She dances so gracefully around the complicated topic of her father, with whom she has a complicated and even resentful relationship. She addresses her issues but is at the same time very respectful, and all the while the book is dedicated completely to her mother - none of the father complications take a way from that, it is still only through the lens of her mother and her mother's death.
There is also so much food writing in this. I suppose that is somewhat implied by the title, but discreetly so, I would say, and nicely done. Be warned, you'll get hungry. But food is just another mediary through which Zauner navigates not only her identity and her relationship with her mother; it's also a reflection of her emotional changes throughout her mother's illness. It ties everything together.
When I started reading this book, I hadn't made it far before I found a line about growing up without a diaspora that really resonated with me. I wish I could find my notes and highlights now! I knew I was in for something good, and it just continued to be that. Even though it's such a tough and serious topic, it never dragged me down. I found this book so easy to read, like I just glided through it, stopping only to highlight striking phrases. Just beautiful. It lives up to the hype. I'm in awe of what Zauner did here. Read it.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death of parent, Terminal illness, Grief, Medical trauma, and Cancer
Moderate: Alcoholism
Minor: Car accident and Drug abuse
mayadelaine's review
emotional
reflective
sad
slow-paced
4.75
Zauner will have you crying through every chapter. Emotionally exhausting but meaningfully reflective on mother-daughter relationships and on connection to culture.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Terminal illness, Alcoholism, Xenophobia, and Racism
signeskov's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
medium-paced
5.0
A beautiful read, providing heartache and important reflections on life, death, identity, motherhood, and grief throughout. The audiobook read by Zauner herself only made the experience even more intimate; anyone who has needed to deal with any of the themes mentioned just above are bound to be moved by and find something in themselves similar to Zauner’s story.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Cancer, Death, Death of parent, and Terminal illness
Moderate: Mental illness and Alcoholism
aformeracceleratedreader's review against another edition
reflective
sad
medium-paced
5.0
I really enjoyed and related to this. I'm also mixed Asian with an Asian immigrant mother so the love/relationship in the book is very similar to my own with my mom. My mom also told my sisters and me a very big secret/life event that shook us and reminded us that we dont know our mom like we think we do like the author's mom telling the author her secret. I also strongly related with the discussion of identity and the struggles of not being seen as enough.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Medical content, Terminal illness, Grief, Cancer, and Death of parent
Moderate: Alcoholism, Bullying, Racism, and Alcohol
aliciae08's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
5.0
Apparently I am on a memoir kick where grief is a massive theme. I read Crying in H Mart after seeing and hearing so many positive reviews, and I’m glad I did.
It’s about Michelle’s relationship to her mother and what happens when her mother gets sick, but it’s also about her relationship to herself/her cultural identity through food. She asks herself whether she can claim being Korean without her mother validating her existence, and making sense of her existence as a mixed child. She explores this relationship with her food, conjuring up memories of her mother within those recipes and snacks.
This memoir very much read as though someone was writing it for themselves. There are times when the characters aren’t at all likable. As some of the other reviews mentioned, the relationship comes across as sometimes abusive—but saying that, I think the relationship Michelle paints with her mother is very much her own, and she never describes it as being such (she might in the future, but right now she doesn’t). The book was good in that it felt very real. Michelle is not a gracious caregiver—she put so much on wanting her mother to see all the ways she she could adult. Very rarely are caregivers full of the grace the general society demands of them—they’re human and have a range of emotions from resentment to love to adoration to scorn, often in the same moments. Michelle captures this well.
Her relationship with her father is touched upon, and I can see her disappointment. Where she wanted someone to lean on, he was taking up all the space and grief, making decisions that would impact a child in a negative way, no matter the amount of financial support he may have given her in the end.
There were parts that felt mundane, as life sometimes is, but it still struck a cord with me.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death of parent and Cancer
Minor: Abortion, Addiction, and Alcoholism
bashsbooks's review against another edition
emotional
reflective
sad
medium-paced
4.5
A love letter to the complicated relationship between mother and child, Crying in H Mart navigates the grief of losing loved ones and the grief of being disconnected from your culture. Zauner has an incredible and strong voice, ripe with unique observations and striking linguistic choices. And tracing these emotion and relationships through food? Brilliant.
Now I'm going to listen to Japanese Breakfast's Psychopomp.
Now I'm going to listen to Japanese Breakfast's Psychopomp.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Death, Terminal illness, Death of parent, Medical trauma, Grief, Cancer, and Medical content
Moderate: Alcohol, Alcoholism, Drug abuse, Drug use, and Racism
Minor: Blood, Body shaming, Car accident, Infidelity, and Vomit
askirmishofwit's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Cancer, Death of parent, Death, Grief, and Medical content
Minor: Abortion, Domestic abuse, Alcoholism, and Car accident
cateyackerman's review
challenging
emotional
funny
hopeful
reflective
fast-paced
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Grief, Terminal illness, Medical content, Medical trauma, Death of parent, and Cancer
Moderate: Alcoholism, Car accident, Drug abuse, and Drug use