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jenna_justi2004's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
1.0
Graphic: Biphobia, Body shaming, Bullying, Death, Hate crime, Homophobia, Mental illness, Misogyny, Racial slurs, Sexism, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Blood, Medical content, Car accident, Lesbophobia, Toxic friendship, Sexual harassment, and Dysphoria
fanboyriot's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
Graphic: Ableism, Bullying, Cursing, Deadnaming, Emotional abuse, Hate crime, Homophobia, Misogyny, Panic attacks/disorders, Sexism, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Violence, Toxic friendship, and Dysphoria
Moderate: Body shaming, Death, Infidelity, Mental illness, Sexual assault, Grief, Gaslighting, Alcohol, and Sexual harassment
Minor: Biphobia, Child abuse, Domestic abuse, Drug use, Physical abuse, Racism, Suicidal thoughts, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Lesbophobia, and Injury/Injury detail
alyxinthestars's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
Moderate: Ableism, Bullying, Hate crime, Sexual assault, Transphobia, Violence, Grief, and Dysphoria
Minor: Biphobia, Deadnaming, Death, Homophobia, Infidelity, Misogyny, Sexism, Car accident, and Alcohol
peachpit_gabe's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
Moderate: Ableism, Biphobia, Bullying, Deadnaming, Death, Homophobia, Racism, Transphobia, and Lesbophobia
lish_reads's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.75
Graphic: Ableism, Deadnaming, Hate crime, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Toxic friendship, and Dysphoria
Moderate: Biphobia, Death, Drug use, Misogyny, Physical abuse, Blood, Lesbophobia, Alcohol, and Injury/Injury detail
Minor: Sexual assault
seawarrior's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.0
Both boys could be horrible throughout the story. I spent most of it angry with Jeremy in particular. However, I did see my own angry, terrified, newly transitioning teenage self reflected in his rage and self destructive views. Anger is a key theme throughout the book; Jeremy takes it out on others, while Lukas turns it against himself.
It's not exactly rewarding to see the ugliest parts of transitioning into a boy transcribed into words, but I do feel it's important. It's rare to find stories that tackle the grief and the rage that trying to find yourself again as a self-made man can inspire. Walking the line between rejecting toxic masculinity from your personhood and protecting yourself from the wrath those who embrace it feel towards you can feel like an everlosing war, especially when trapped in environments with hateful men who are never held accountable. At the same time, we risk losing formerly close relationships with cisgender women who struggle to understand us as both a male and as someone who's experienced similar gender-based violence all our lives. Finding community again in these circumstances can be rough, but it is possible once we learn to let our anger evaporate and trust that our loved ones will protect us once we part with the armor that rage provides. I feel relieved to find a story that embraces these difficult issues as a part of it while still reminding the reader that our lives aren't as hopeless as they can sometimes feel.
I was also excited to find out that Lukas was autistic. His own struggles with wanting to control how people viewed him felt really relatable to me too. Yet I didn't feel he was able to have his tangled emotions and self-hatred resolved as much as Jeremy did, which was disappointing.
Overall, this story was one I really loved. It presents itself less as puzzle piece that fits exactly in place to validate the reader and more like a series of ever-shifting mechanisms that shy away from snapping together so simply. I don't think that's necessarily a flaw. These characters hold a lot of meaning for me and I expect them to stick with me for a long time. If their author ever wants to continue their story, I would be delighted to re-enter their world.
Graphic: Ableism, Bullying, Cursing, Hate crime, Homophobia, Sexual assault, Transphobia, Violence, Grief, and Dysphoria
Moderate: Biphobia, Drug use, Fatphobia, Racism, Antisemitism, and Alcohol
nickoliver's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
Graphic: Bullying, Deadnaming, Homophobia, Sexism, Sexual assault, and Transphobia
Moderate: Ableism, Death, Physical abuse, and Grief
Minor: Biphobia, Blood, and Alcohol
Re: homophobia and ableism, there's also use of the f-slur and the r-word.sunsetcity's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? No
- Loveable characters? No
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
2.5
Graphic: Biphobia, Body shaming, Bullying, Cursing, Deadnaming, Death, Infidelity, Misogyny, Sexism, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Transphobia, Grief, Car accident, Lesbophobia, Toxic friendship, and Sexual harassment
joinreallife's review against another edition
3.5
Boy howdy, this book was tough. There is A LOT of trauma represented here. And also, a really important look at identity and how messy and shitty teenagers are, and about internalized and socialized gender roles, and communication, and community. Jeremy and Lukas are both in their senior year at what essentially seems to be a prep school. There's lots of alumni-backed money specifically for Homecoming, and the whole book centers around the lead-up to the big game/dance. They used to date. Jeremy came out as trans recently, he breaks up with Lukas in a pretty drastic way (on the day of Lukas' brother's funeral) for reasons that are unclear to Lukas, now they're mortal enemies and are competing for the role of Homecoming King. Even before they were dating, they had been best friends for a really long time, so they have a lot of the same friends, and there's approximately a metric shit-ton of drama that ensues. Lukas is also grappling with being autistic but not wanting anyone at school to know about that, so rather than ask for accommodations for his disability, he decides to cheat. (I've seen some criticisms that the autism rep only comes up with relevance to Lukas' schoolwork, but it's pretty obvious to me that a big part of the miscommunications that happen are people expecting Lukas to pick up on social cues that he has trouble reading, and them getting upset when he doesn't get it. So that criticism doesn't really hold water to me, but I'm also not an autistic reviewer, so I can't speak 100% to that.)
If you are a person who needs to like the main characters to enjoy a book, I would think twice about this one. Then again, if you are a person who doesn't remember what it was like to be in high school...I mean, I don't know anyone who was perfectly likeable in high school. Though I have not been a trans boy in high school, I have been a post-trauma kid in high school, imagining that I should hurt other people before they have a chance to hurt me. I found that so relatable. I ALSO was the kid who covered immense sadness with anger because anger is an easier, more familiar emotion to deal with. Was Jeremy truly terrible to people who he claimed were friends? Yes. Is there really a satisfactory resolution to that, or a true reckoning for Jeremy about how incredibly self-centered he is? Not really. But one of the most interesting aspects of this book to me was the kind of overcorrection that Jeremy feels he has to do to convince everyone that he's a boy, which feels like the root of so much of his hurtful behavior. Imagining how it must feel to have something that feels so obvious to you be something you need to convince people of, that you have to constantly defend...I understand where the overcorrection comes from. So in order to make sure that people see him as a guy, Jeremy adopts some aspects of toxic masculinity, telling himself he has to do certain things because "that's what a guy would do" AND to distance himself from anything that might be seen as "feminine" because there's always the risk that people will think that he's not serious about being trans. Ellor mirrors that with a class assignment where Jeremy has to create a persuasive speech about a particular hot topic, and his is trans rights. Yikes. That was so devastating to read, honestly, that any trans person but a teenager especially has to spend their brain power worrying about that stuff rather than just being an idiot kid.
There were a couple of things that brought it down a star(ish) in my mind. I think the ending resolved too quickly for my tastes, and there were a number of things that didn't really get wrapped up as a result. The treatment of the "side characters" felt pretty crummy, they really only exist as vehicles for Jeremy and Lukas and not as people in their own right (though I would love to read a book about whatever's going on with Sol and Naomi), and I didn't love that. It could have been a really great opportunity for found family and queer community, and I think that Ellor was trying to elicit that feel, but since it wasn't the A (or B or C) plot, it didn't really develop in the way that I would have liked to see. Lukas' realization that he's not straight was less an epiphany and more of a throwaway, which felt strange to me, but I suppose that's how it might be for some folks when they're realizing their sexuality (though it wasn't for me) and it's true that there were about a fafillion other things happening in his life. I do think there was, like, one thing too many for me here, but overall, I'm glad to have read it and I can already tell it's one that I'm going to be thinking about it often.
Thanks to NetGalley and MacMillan Children's Publishing Group/Roaring Brook Press for an advance copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.
Graphic: Ableism, Bullying, Deadnaming, Homophobia, Physical abuse, Transphobia, and Grief
Moderate: Biphobia, Death, Hate crime, Racism, Sexual assault, Toxic relationship, and Car accident
spearly's review against another edition
- Plot- or character-driven? Plot
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.5
Do not let this incredible cover fool you. This is not a fluffy, easy story.
TW: Transphobia, dead naming, misogyny, bullying, attempted sexual assault, harassment, violence, homophobia, ableism
Exes Jeremy and Lukas have a lot on the line with the Homecoming king title. For Lukas, it means stepping out of his late brother's shadow and earning a sure acceptance into one of the ivy leagues that would finally make his parent's proud. For Jeremy, it means everyone has finally accepted what he's always known: he is a guy, and he's not gonna let his pseudo-progressive school and some transphobic classmates stand in his way. But before he came out, Jeremy used to be Lukas's girlfriend, and Lukas never understood why he ended things. Competition heats up as the two vie for the crown, and neither of them seem to care who they hurt in the process.
First and foremost, the audiobook was great. I did end up listening to it in 1.25 speed, but I loved the narrator, Avi Roque, and found the voices of all the characters easy enough to follow. I'm also very happy Avi is a member of the LGBTQ+ community themself. They were a great fit, and really brought the book to life!
Lets start with the good: I feel like I am better for having read this story. Ellor goes very into depth on several trans issues, and even though I wasn't a huge fan of Jeremy's character, I really understood where he was coming from. He has a truly great arc in the book, and his chapters definitely opened my eyes more to the trans experience. Ellor also delved into ableist issues with our other lead, Lukas, who is neuro-divergent. His chapters stuck out to me; Lukas's voice was so raw, so needing, so lost. I wanted to give him a big hug.
We also have a great cast of side characters, all of whom felt distinct and fleshed out, and all of whom had their own issues going on outside the main conflicts of the story. Ellor's diversity extended well beyond the two white male leads, and I was happy to see issues of race and the gender spectrum talked about as well.
All that said, I found the book a bit tough to get through because, obviously, it deals with some heavy themes. But more so because I really didn't enjoy Jeremy's character. Like I mentioned, I understand why he is the way he is. He's a small guy struggling to be seen in the world as he sees himself, constantly having to remind others of his gender identity and queerness. Fighting against transphobia, both overt and unconscious. So I get it. But like... he is also kind of an asshole. I won't go too much into detail (you'll have to read it for yourself!), but let's just say his arc is one of the most dramatic in the book.
Lukas. My sweet bb Lukas. I love that kid. An angel who just wants to keep his family together. A kid who struggles with social cues and nuance and has no idea why the guy he loves dumped him out of no-where before coming out. A boy who wants to be homecoming king so he can get into an ivy school and finally fill the shoes left behind by his perfect brother. I'm a bit bias... he's definitely not perfect. He makes mistakes. He takes things too far in his competition for the crown.
Complicated characters. Deep themes, troubling to some. Lots of ups and downs. A very relevant story in today's day and age; even as progressive as someone might think they are, there will always be things that cishet people can never understand. Thankfully we have people like Z.R. Ellor to tell the stories we need to hear.
Graphic: Ableism, Body shaming, Bullying, Cursing, Deadnaming, Hate crime, Homophobia, Infidelity, Panic attacks/disorders, Transphobia, and Violence
Moderate: Misogyny and Blood
Minor: Biphobia, Sexual assault, Suicidal thoughts, and Vomit