zoes_human's review against another edition
DNFed three and a half essays in. It appears to be a book full of essays about middle-class, mostly white, mostly urban, mostly cisgender, and mostly heterosexual women working out their personal issues in relationships. Yay for self-examination, but I'm not particularly interested in reading it. Basically, it's your typical middle class ennui lit, but female this time.
INDIVIDUAL ESSAY RATINGS AND COMMENTS
Excuse Me While I Explode: My Mother, Myself, My Anger
E. S. Maduro
3 stars
Amazingly self-aware, the author examines her conflicting goals and wonders how to find a satisfying future with less anger.
Getting the Milk for Free
Veronica Chambers
2 stars
Ummm ... I just can't relate to this one very much, and I didn't find the point of it to be all that interesting.
Crossing to Safety
Jen Marshall
3 stars
A nice essay about one woman's trip of self-discovery in learning that the relationship "goals" placed before us all weren't actually what she wanted.
>Moving In. Moving Out. Moving On.
Sarah Miller
DNF
Oh man, yet another middle class lady coming to terms with herself. I'm out.
INDIVIDUAL ESSAY RATINGS AND COMMENTS
Excuse Me While I Explode: My Mother, Myself, My Anger
E. S. Maduro
3 stars
Amazingly self-aware, the author examines her conflicting goals and wonders how to find a satisfying future with less anger.
Getting the Milk for Free
Veronica Chambers
2 stars
Ummm ... I just can't relate to this one very much, and I didn't find the point of it to be all that interesting.
Crossing to Safety
Jen Marshall
3 stars
A nice essay about one woman's trip of self-discovery in learning that the relationship "goals" placed before us all weren't actually what she wanted.
>Moving In. Moving Out. Moving On.
Sarah Miller
DNF
Oh man, yet another middle class lady coming to terms with herself. I'm out.
imabrunette23's review against another edition
4.0
Personally, I really liked the essays in this book. Yes, some of them were not to my taste, but for the most part, I felt like I identified with some part of all of them. Then again, I'm in that space right now, trying to figure out what it means to me to be a wife, and what it will mean to me to be a mother. It's probably not something most men would find interesting, it's definitely gender specific. It helped me feel less... alone... reading other women working through some of the same issues I currently am. It helped me to hear someone else insist that marriage and babies are not always straight out of a fairy tale. Sometimes, it sucks and you're angry and the world will not end if you're a "bitch."
kristennd's review against another edition
4.0
This felt more negative than the men's version. Interestingly, although these writers were also more angry than their husbands, they were also accepting more blame for their situations. Like Pamela Stone's [Book:Opting Out?], this collection made me kinda glad I'm not a Type-A and thus have no grand ambitions to worry about giving up. Because they always have to give them up. At the same time, there seemed to be a thread of unrealistic expectations. Most of the writers grew up with mothers who did all the housework. So no wonder that they're frustrated at doing it now. They don't want to do any housework, shared or otherwise. As someone with a long list of childhood chores, that made me less than sympathetic. Living together didn't come out looking like a great option, surprisingly. There was one piece explaining why the author and her partner will never marry, which was interesting and entertaining but I never figured out her reason. A few observations I particularly liked: Kate Christensen: "Like most of the girls I knew when I was growing up, I'd always assumed I'd marry the perfect man. But for me, the man himself wasn't an important element in my fantasies of the future; he existed in my imagination as a flawless but shadowy alter ego, a male version of myself who would read my mind, meet all my needs, and have none of his own." Cynthia Kling (on relationship advice from well-meaning friends): "Women complain that men boss them around and tell them what to do, but what about all that female coercion? The oppressive solidarity of the smart-girl set?" Ellen Gilchrist: "I think older women probably make better mothers in many ways. But young women are more selfish and you have to be selfish to demand time for yourself when you have children. Young women are closer to the time when they were manipulative and childish and they don't let their babies manipulate them as much as older mothers do. These are only my conclusions from watching children in grocery stores."
monenahall's review
2.0
I'm not in love with this book. Some of the stories are interesting, some less so. I have a huge pile to read. Not sure this is worth finishing.
toniobarton's review against another edition
5.0
Collection of short stories about marriage, work, children, divorce, affairs and dress sizes. . . So blunt, truthful, wonderful.
travelinkiki's review against another edition
4.0
I wasn't sure how I'd feel about this book since the reviews are all over the place. I went in with an open mind, and I'm so glad I did. I loved the stories, and I actually want more. Each of the women shared their story - whatever story that happened to be. They opened themselves up for judgment and share very uncomfortable truths from their lives.
Although I do agree with other reviewers that it would be better to have a more diverse set of authors for the essays, I was still able to identify with something from everyone's essay. There is something universal about the things these women wrote that I felt was powerful and touching.
I didn't see the stories as whiny or bitchy at all. They were personal stories and feelings, and I think there is a lot of overlap in how women are made to feel about our choices. Why those hardships are perceived as whiny, I'm not entirely sure - I just viewed it as the stories for each of those women.
Speaking of which, an unexpected finding of this book was the relief I felt in my own choice to be childfree. The trials and tribulations of motherhood became clear in ways that most other writers won't discuss (probably because they'd be accused of being bitchy). I appreciated this open honest viewing of life with kids, and it just solidified for me that I made the right choice.
I don't think for a second that everyone will walk away from the book with this feeling. In fact, I would expect that some women will want a child even more. But, that's the beauty of a personal story - everyone can take from it what they want or need. There is no one truth to fit us all.
Although I do agree with other reviewers that it would be better to have a more diverse set of authors for the essays, I was still able to identify with something from everyone's essay. There is something universal about the things these women wrote that I felt was powerful and touching.
I didn't see the stories as whiny or bitchy at all. They were personal stories and feelings, and I think there is a lot of overlap in how women are made to feel about our choices. Why those hardships are perceived as whiny, I'm not entirely sure - I just viewed it as the stories for each of those women.
Speaking of which, an unexpected finding of this book was the relief I felt in my own choice to be childfree. The trials and tribulations of motherhood became clear in ways that most other writers won't discuss (probably because they'd be accused of being bitchy). I appreciated this open honest viewing of life with kids, and it just solidified for me that I made the right choice.
I don't think for a second that everyone will walk away from the book with this feeling. In fact, I would expect that some women will want a child even more. But, that's the beauty of a personal story - everyone can take from it what they want or need. There is no one truth to fit us all.
melloves2read's review against another edition
5.0
Some essays spoke to me more than others, but overall I was entranced by these women and their stories. Their honest sharing of their lives and doubts, dreams, mistakes, choices felt like a gift. I would love to meet some of them and talk to them over coffee.