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gomentskki's review against another edition
challenging
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.75
boundlessbookwriting's review against another edition
1.0
I know it wasn't the best idea to read this book. I read You Truly Assumed by Laila Sabreen and I loved it despite some weird things I noticed about it, but this book was too much. I know that I'm probably not the target audience because I'm a Christian (born and raised in Saudi Arabia for fourteen years) and I don't have an Islamic perspective on books written by Muslims for Muslims.
I want you to read this blurb, which tells you all you need to know about the book before you even start reading it.
A queer hijabi Muslim immigrant survives her coming-of-age by drawing strength and hope from stories in the Quran in this daring, provocative, and radically hopeful memoir.
When fourteen-year-old Lamya H realizes she has a crush on her teacher--her female teacher--she covers up her attraction, an attraction she can't yet name, by playing up her roles as overachiever and class clown. Born in South Asia, she moved to the Middle East at a young age and has spent years feeling out of place, like her own desires and dreams don't matter, and it's easier to hide in plain sight. To disappear. But one day in Quran class, she reads a passage about Maryam that changes everything: when Maryam learned that she was pregnant, she insisted no man had touched her. Could Maryam, uninterested in men, be . . . like Lamya?
From that moment on, Lamya makes sense of her struggles and triumphs by comparing her experiences with some of the most famous stories in the Quran. She juxtaposes her coming out with Musa liberating his people from the pharoah; asks if Allah, who is neither male nor female, might instead be nonbinary; and, drawing on the faith and hope Nuh needed to construct his ark, begins to build a life of her own--ultimately finding that the answer to her lifelong quest for community and belonging lies in owning her identity as a queer, devout Muslim immigrant.
This searingly intimate memoir in essays, spanning Lamya's childhood to her arrival in the United States for college through early-adult life in New York City, tells a universal story of courage, trust, and love, celebrating what it means to be a seeker and an architect of one's own life.
OK... we're already going a bit too far with this.
1. Suspecting that Allah is non-binary when He is referred to with male pronouns in the Quran and all Islamic texts. This blasphemy in Islam to try to label Allah as a non-binary person, because pronouns such as they/them would suggest Allah is more than one person, which goes against the values of the Quran.
2. The Virgin Mary was not a lesbian, as the author suggests. If the Virgin Mary not being touched by any man makes her a lesbian, all Catholic nuns who make a vow of remaining chaste for life are also automatically lesbians because they live around other women and seldom associate with men.
3. Comparing openly becoming queer to Moses freeing the Israelites is a whole other level of low. And I'll explain why. The Israelites were in bondage in Egypt. They were slaves. They were tortured, beaten, forced to do free labor, and traumatized beyond imagination. Moses went through so much and had to gather plenty of courage to free his people, with the help of the Almighty God. The story of Exodus isn't comparable to someone openly expressing their queerness. Was Lamya being enslaved while closeted? Did she feel enslaved as a closeted queer? I can't read her mind, but this comparison was beyond disrespectful and disgraceful. The situation of the Israelite slaves was much worse than Lamya's. Trying to find similarities between Moses freeing the slaves from the stony Pharaoh of Egypt and coming out of the closet is like comparing a plane crash to a toddler falling off of their tricycle.
I am not a supporter of the LGBTQIA+, but I do know that coming out is a very challenging process that takes a toll on someone's mental and emotional health. It strains relationships as well. However, it can never be compared to enslavement and severe torture.
With that being said, I believe this book shouldn't have been a nominee for Best Memoir & Autobiography, and it shouldn't have gotten an award from Goodreads. It is disrespectful to not only Islam but also Christianity since she uses Bible stories to justify her queerness (the Virgin Mary & Moses Freeing the Israelites). Disappointed and I'm glad I saw the warning coming when I read the description. Never will read another book by Lamya H. because of this.
I want you to read this blurb, which tells you all you need to know about the book before you even start reading it.
A queer hijabi Muslim immigrant survives her coming-of-age by drawing strength and hope from stories in the Quran in this daring, provocative, and radically hopeful memoir.
When fourteen-year-old Lamya H realizes she has a crush on her teacher--her female teacher--she covers up her attraction, an attraction she can't yet name, by playing up her roles as overachiever and class clown. Born in South Asia, she moved to the Middle East at a young age and has spent years feeling out of place, like her own desires and dreams don't matter, and it's easier to hide in plain sight. To disappear. But one day in Quran class, she reads a passage about Maryam that changes everything: when Maryam learned that she was pregnant, she insisted no man had touched her. Could Maryam, uninterested in men, be . . . like Lamya?
From that moment on, Lamya makes sense of her struggles and triumphs by comparing her experiences with some of the most famous stories in the Quran. She juxtaposes her coming out with Musa liberating his people from the pharoah; asks if Allah, who is neither male nor female, might instead be nonbinary; and, drawing on the faith and hope Nuh needed to construct his ark, begins to build a life of her own--ultimately finding that the answer to her lifelong quest for community and belonging lies in owning her identity as a queer, devout Muslim immigrant.
This searingly intimate memoir in essays, spanning Lamya's childhood to her arrival in the United States for college through early-adult life in New York City, tells a universal story of courage, trust, and love, celebrating what it means to be a seeker and an architect of one's own life.
OK... we're already going a bit too far with this.
1. Suspecting that Allah is non-binary when He is referred to with male pronouns in the Quran and all Islamic texts. This blasphemy in Islam to try to label Allah as a non-binary person, because pronouns such as they/them would suggest Allah is more than one person, which goes against the values of the Quran.
2. The Virgin Mary was not a lesbian, as the author suggests. If the Virgin Mary not being touched by any man makes her a lesbian, all Catholic nuns who make a vow of remaining chaste for life are also automatically lesbians because they live around other women and seldom associate with men.
3. Comparing openly becoming queer to Moses freeing the Israelites is a whole other level of low. And I'll explain why. The Israelites were in bondage in Egypt. They were slaves. They were tortured, beaten, forced to do free labor, and traumatized beyond imagination. Moses went through so much and had to gather plenty of courage to free his people, with the help of the Almighty God. The story of Exodus isn't comparable to someone openly expressing their queerness. Was Lamya being enslaved while closeted? Did she feel enslaved as a closeted queer? I can't read her mind, but this comparison was beyond disrespectful and disgraceful. The situation of the Israelite slaves was much worse than Lamya's. Trying to find similarities between Moses freeing the slaves from the stony Pharaoh of Egypt and coming out of the closet is like comparing a plane crash to a toddler falling off of their tricycle.
I am not a supporter of the LGBTQIA+, but I do know that coming out is a very challenging process that takes a toll on someone's mental and emotional health. It strains relationships as well. However, it can never be compared to enslavement and severe torture.
With that being said, I believe this book shouldn't have been a nominee for Best Memoir & Autobiography, and it shouldn't have gotten an award from Goodreads. It is disrespectful to not only Islam but also Christianity since she uses Bible stories to justify her queerness (the Virgin Mary & Moses Freeing the Israelites). Disappointed and I'm glad I saw the warning coming when I read the description. Never will read another book by Lamya H. because of this.
prologues_epilogues's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
sad
medium-paced
4.25
So much of this resonates so deeply. Beautiful reflections on the way that faith and sexuality intersect. Some say that some of the discussion of the prophets was blasphemous, so maybe avoid this if you aren't open to other interpretations of Quranic texts.
shelleyanderson4127's review against another edition
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.0
It's Banned Books Week (September 22-28) and I completely understand why this memoir has been banned in the US.
It's compelling, well written and honest. It's about a young lesbian woman, taken by her hard working parents from her South Asian home to a Middle Eastern country. She's poorer and darker than her class mates, many of whom are told by their parents not to associate with her.
Bored by boys, buoyed by crushes on her women teachers, she has a sudden revelation in her usually boring Quran class: the esteemed Maryam was never touched by any man. Was Maryam like her?
I learned so much from this thoughtfully written account of Lamya's discovery of her sexuality and identity, and how her deep faith supported her as she struggled with moving to the US, finishing grad school, navigating American white supremacy and Islamophobia, and gradually becoming herself: a proud, butch, hijabi woman.
This is a highly readable book for anyone interested in queer life, in spirituality, and how both meet in lived experience. I thoroughly enjoyed it. But beware: as with many banned books, both your knowledge of the world and your empathy may grow with reading it. Either one might put you at risk of becoming a better person.
male_soley's review against another edition
emotional
funny
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
fast-paced
5.0
I picked up this book to learn more about the intersection of being queer and Muslim (as a queer non-religious person in a Christianity dominated country) and I feel like my goal was accomplished and even more. I gained new insights and I felt with Kayla throughout the book. The non linearity was unexpected and left me a little bit confused at times but that doesn't change at all how much I enjoyed the book. I felt so many different emotions while reading and I'm just really glad I bought this book.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Homophobia, Racism, Sexism, Transphobia, and Islamophobia
Moderate: Suicidal thoughts
tuhmeeyur's review against another edition
5.0
wow. this was one of those books that felt like my lived experience taken right out of my journal or honestly my head. lamya's experience mirrors my own in so many validating ways. her views on queerness so obviously shaped by her brown immigrant and muslim identities. her relationship to her foreign family members is one i understand deeply and intrinsically and that my american counterparts--even the black ones--simply don't. "coming out" is not as simple as it seems to them. family is everything to cultures outside the u.s., especially conservatively religious ones, and it is not their faults they don't understand us now. being seperated from ones family by this seemingly un-crossable cavern is a unique pain of queerdom seldom captured the way lamya does in this book. her awakenings to her own identity, her finding of chosen family, her feminist anger at the world, it all felt so comfortingly familiar to me.
however, the star of this touching and deeply personal memoir was not any of the aforementioned relatable content, but rather the somewhat foreign concepts of queerness somehow being woven into the stories of the quran (and by extension the bible). lamya's interpretation of the quran is the most beautiful devotion to faith i have ever witnessed. not a blind allegiance to a religion, but a true feeling of understanding that can only come from deep curiosity and seeking. you can tell how thoughtful she is about her religion, her god. it's more than inspiring to see how that shapes her identity which so threatens others' preconceived ideas. lamya, you are seen, i hope and pray you are happy and at peace wherever you are, perhaps closer than i realize.
however, the star of this touching and deeply personal memoir was not any of the aforementioned relatable content, but rather the somewhat foreign concepts of queerness somehow being woven into the stories of the quran (and by extension the bible). lamya's interpretation of the quran is the most beautiful devotion to faith i have ever witnessed. not a blind allegiance to a religion, but a true feeling of understanding that can only come from deep curiosity and seeking. you can tell how thoughtful she is about her religion, her god. it's more than inspiring to see how that shapes her identity which so threatens others' preconceived ideas. lamya, you are seen, i hope and pray you are happy and at peace wherever you are, perhaps closer than i realize.
jbuvalentine's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
samanthaash_'s review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
medium-paced
3.0