Reviews tagging 'Infidelity'

Una vita come tante by Hanya Yanagihara

148 reviews

vin_eeta_3's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? It's complicated
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Body shaming, Child abuse, Child death, Chronic illness, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Vomit, Grief, Medical trauma, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Sexual harassment, and Injury/Injury detail

eaupaline's review against another edition

challenging dark sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

2.75

Honestly the more reviews I read about this book the more I realized I don't really liked it.

My feelings about this novel are rather mixed. Overall I liked the writing, the character and the deep sense of nostalgia that I had when reading it. I thought it said a lot of beautiful things about friendship and love, too. The characters feel close to us and we see them grow for so long that it's difficult not to get attached - my favorite were probably Malcolm, although we don't see that much of him, and Andy.

What troubles me though is the extremely graphic scenes of violence, and how deep we delve into Jude's past. It sometimes felt like trauma porn or voyeurism and I really don't think being that explicit was absolutely necessary and the only right way to convey the misery of this character's childhood. 
It's a very personal feeling but at some points reading about his past almost felt like a trahison, Jude's character being so secretive and dignified, it felt as if I was discovering his past without his consent, and I thought it was weird and clumsy. 
I didn't get this feeling until some point in Jude's story though.

The whole part about the monastery was okay to read, the part with Brother Luke a little less, and the one with Dr Traylor just had me roll my eyes.

It really seems so far-fetched and grotesque sometimes that by the 3/4 of the book I was eager to finish it. It's not that the depictions where unbearable - they barely are bearable - but I kept asking myself what was the point of being that gruesome. It's a shame though. It's an interesting book, but it could have been shorter, more well-thought, more intelligent, more sincrere. It's basically a disappointement for me.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Pedophilia, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Suicide, Torture, Violence, and Suicide attempt

Moderate: Ableism, Addiction, Body shaming, Domestic abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Physical abuse, Suicidal thoughts, Blood, Medical content, Car accident, Gaslighting, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail

Minor: Child death, Infidelity, and Racism

rachel_emily22's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense medium-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Biphobia, Body horror, Body shaming, Bullying, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Confinement, Cursing, Deadnaming, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Gore, Homophobia, Incest, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Vomit, Medical content, Dementia, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Grief, Religious bigotry, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, Acephobia/Arophobia, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , Fire/Fire injury, Outing, Gaslighting, Abandonment, Alcohol, Sexual harassment, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail

cturn's review against another edition

dark emotional reflective tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.0

Characters - 9
Atmosphere - 6
Writing - 9
Plot - 9
Intrigue - 7
Logic - 8
Enjoyment - 7
CAWPILE score - 7.9

Sad is an understatement for this book. Its hard to rate such a sad book for enjoyment lol. I see what people mean when they call it trauma porn but I don't see it as quite that. However I found that as a reader, the effect of each revelation of Jude's past was less and less each reveal, as if I was desensitised to it as more was revealed. I particularly enjoyed when characters were introspective and reflecting on their actions and both positives and negatives of their own personality, when they knew they were being irrational, etc - I think those were my favourite parts to read about. I didn't sob over this book like you see a lot of people on tiktok doing, but I did cry at the end and I will think about this story, these characters that we got to know so well, for a long time. 

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Child abuse, Death, Mental illness, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Trafficking, Grief, Suicide attempt, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Addiction, Child death, Drug abuse, Drug use, Infidelity, Panic attacks/disorders, Religious bigotry, Car accident, and Death of parent

Minor: Vomit and Abandonment

selimhannah's review against another edition

dark emotional slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? No
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body horror, Body shaming, Child abuse, Child death, Chronic illness, Confinement, Death, Domestic abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Violence, Blood, Medical content, Trafficking, Kidnapping, Grief, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Fire/Fire injury, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Bullying, Drug use, Infidelity, Panic attacks/disorders, Racism, Sexual content, Suicidal thoughts, Forced institutionalization, Vomit, Religious bigotry, Stalking, Outing, Gaslighting, Toxic friendship, Abandonment, and Alcohol

oscarlavista's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

5.0

Unrelenting tragedy and heartbreak. I don't think I could ever recommend this to anyone but I also think everyone should find the time to read it. 
It's slow, it trudges, and it hits so hard right in the heart. It's awful. I knew it would be, but I was so compelled to give it the time it deserved. It's simply a modern classic that should never be experienced by anyone.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Toxic relationship, Violence, Vomit, Medical content, Grief, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Toxic friendship, and Sexual harassment

Moderate: Body shaming, Child death, Car accident, and Abandonment

thestarsaresad's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.75

I don't even know what to say. Admittedly, this book was slow. I could barely get myself to read each day because of how long the chapters are; it's like because I knew each chapter would take me an hour minimum to read, I didn't want to. However, looking back on this after finishing, I think it's incredible how Yanagihara has managed to condense decades of life into this story. At times, I was jolted back to reality realizing that decades have gone by in Jude's, Willem's, everyone's lives. To be honest, it kind of reminds me of Bitlife a little bit, how you can see every moment of someone's life, both big and small.

Even though the first 600 pages are brutal to get through, I fully believe that they're necessary for the ending to hit as hard. I spent the last 100 pages of this book ugly-crying, to the point where I didn't even understand how I was able to continue reading. It's not even that Willem's (and Malcolm's and Sophie's) death are that gruesome, it's just the utter SHOCK that it happened. The whole book, we slowly learn about Jude's backstory, about his cutting, and about his constant medical issues -- we're given so much time to prepare for his death. It's because there's no indication at all that it will be Willem who dies first that's so shocking. Even more depressingly, it's life. But what makes the loss hit hard for the reader as well is that we've followed Jude and Willem and everyone in their lives for decades. It feels like we've been by their sides as they've grown up from children to adults. And because we've seen all the little moments, at the end, we too know just how much they have lost. Truly, why would someone want to write this? The saddest part of these last 100 pages -- what made me really cry -- is how it just follows Jude through his grief. It has all the little details of handling grief; there are the little moments, the ups and downs, and the people who are there for you. It feels like you're experiencing the grief of losing someone in your life that you love; it's the little moments that just make you break down. It's just so unfortunate that Jude had finally gotten to this place in his life where he has almost everything he ever wanted, and had to lose the one thing that is most important to him.

I think what truly makes this book great is that it has ALL the moments of life: the good, the bad, the ugly. Good people do good things, good people do bad things, bad people do good things, bad people do bad things. Good people have good things happen to them, good people also have bad things happen to them. Bad people have good things happen to them, bad people also have bad things happen to them. Yanagihara writes life as it actually is, without glossing over the ugly or playing up the good. But mostly, what I loved about this whole journey was seeing just how loved and loving people can be. That's the truest underlying theme.

After taking over a month to read this book, I will say that the amount of time I took to read A Little Life does not equate to how good I found it. Even though I took forever to get into this book and to really enjoy it, it is written so so well. I will say, however, that I don't think I'll be able to read this book again, at least not in the near future. Maybe when it's been years and years and I've completely forgotten what this book is about, then I'll reread it. However, I truly feel that this book is meant to be a one-time read.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Adult/minor relationship, Child abuse, Death, Eating disorder, Gore, Pedophilia, Self harm, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Medical content, Grief, Suicide attempt, Fire/Fire injury, and Injury/Injury detail

Moderate: Addiction, Body horror, Body shaming, Confinement, Drug abuse, Emotional abuse, Mental illness, Physical abuse, Rape, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Toxic relationship, Violence, Vomit, Kidnapping, and Car accident

Minor: Infidelity, Blood, Dementia, and Abandonment

PLEASE make sure you look over the content warnings before you start. I'm not someone who normally looks at content warnings, and while I don't think it was necessary for me after finishing this book, this was definitely a book full of heavy content. Almost every content warning possible is checked off of the list for this book. What sets it apart for me is that Yanagihara goes into detail for the parts of the book that concern MANY of these content warnings. Even though I know the content warnings here are tiered, I'll provide a list of the content warnings that are most brought up and recurring in this book.

1. Self harm, suicidal thoughts, suicide, suicide attempt 2. Adult/minor relationship, pedophilia 3. Physical abuse, rape 4. Medical content, injury/injury detail

Please, I'm telling you! Yanagihara does not hold back on the details, so know what you're getting yourself into. <3

anemosise's review against another edition

dark emotional reflective slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? It's complicated
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

oh my i am conflicted. understand the criticism deeply, have yet to watch interviews with the author and tbh we'll see if i do! but! my oh my! what effortlessly beautiful writing and what beautiful explorations of human relationships. the dynamics of the (mostly) loveable main characters are so fascinating to me. the beauty of jude slowly learning to stop self-sabotaging his relationships with harold and willem and andy. beautiful. however. i wanted a lot more from jb and especially malcom, and some side characters deserved better development (richard, people at the law firm, caleb, maybe even ana? though I didn't mind some being less developed and simply reappearing names!)

oh and how powerful the ending would have been. if despite everything, despite all the trauma, jude still decided to live. what is the book saying by having him kill himself at the end? some experienced trauma is too unrecoverable for people? i guess I just find that level of pessimism disappointing. gotta think on it more.

i think simply reducing this novel to trauma porn is incredibly reductive of a lot of the work it puts into exploring.. well.. the little moments in life. the people who make the days worth living. yea idk. i think i liked a lot of this, but it left a really uncomfortable distaste in my mouth. man.

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Bullying, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Terminal illness, Torture, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Medical content, Dementia, Kidnapping, Medical trauma, Car accident, Suicide attempt, Death of parent, and Sexual harassment

readwithsara's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional reflective sad slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? A mix
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? No
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

3.0

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Alcoholism, Body shaming, Child abuse, Child death, Chronic illness, Confinement, Death, Domestic abuse, Drug abuse, Drug use, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Fatphobia, Infidelity, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexual assault, Sexual content, Sexual violence, Terminal illness, Toxic relationship, Violence, Forced institutionalization, Blood, Vomit, Dementia, Kidnapping, Grief, Medical trauma, Car accident, Toxic friendship, Alcohol, Dysphoria, and Injury/Injury detail

carlotta25's review against another edition

challenging dark emotional sad tense slow-paced

• Plot- or character-driven? Character
• Strong character development? Yes
• Loveable characters? Yes
• Diverse cast of characters? Yes
• Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes

4.5

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Content Warnings

Graphic: Child abuse, Drug abuse, Eating disorder, Emotional abuse, Physical abuse, Self harm, Sexual assault, and Sexual violence

Moderate: Ableism, Addiction, Adult/minor relationship, Body shaming, Child abuse, Chronic illness, Death, Domestic abuse, Mental illness, Panic attacks/disorders, Pedophilia, Physical abuse, Rape, Self harm, Sexism, Suicidal thoughts, Suicide, Blood, Vomit, Grief, Car accident, and Suicide attempt

Minor: Bullying, Chronic illness, Cursing, Infidelity, Torture, Medical trauma, Death of parent, Schizophrenia/Psychosis , and Gaslighting