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Too Much and Never Enough: How My Family Created the World's Most Dangerous Man by Mary L. Trump
profbanks's review
5.0
This is a really well written book that reads like a multi-generational family drama/tragedy, like something Jeffrey Eugenides might cook up. The difference is that this tragic pressure cooker of a family, with all its ignorance and foibles, happened to produce the man who has done and is doing his level best to terminally screw up America. The fact that the traits that make him so detestable and incompetent are the product of a dysfunctional relationship with his father isn’t really surprising.
What makes this book resonate for me even better than some of the other biography/profiles of Trump is that 1) Mary actually knows him and has done for a long time, and 2) she actually does have the qualifications to speak about his mental health and character. I’ve resisted all armchair diagnoses because they lacked both of these essential features, so it’s interesting to get an informed, educated read at last.
What makes this book resonate for me even better than some of the other biography/profiles of Trump is that 1) Mary actually knows him and has done for a long time, and 2) she actually does have the qualifications to speak about his mental health and character. I’ve resisted all armchair diagnoses because they lacked both of these essential features, so it’s interesting to get an informed, educated read at last.
smalzz's review against another edition
3.0
Interesting in the insight it gives into the Trump family dynamic and the fact that they are all pretty much thoroughly corrupt selfish greedy scumbags. Other than that it doesn't reveal anything about Donald Trump that isn't self-evident. Also her take on Cuomo hasn't exactly aged well given what we know today.
lcs032345's review against another edition
3.0
I am about halfway done with it and need to take a break. I believe every word of this book and it explains a lot about why Donald is the way he is, but it doesn't excuse it. He was clearly raised by detached incompetent parents and has so many mental and emotional issues from his childhood trauma that he has no business being in such a position of influence. It is terrifying that his electorate can't see how unhinged he is and continue to spew praise for him despite his apparent lack of self awareness and angry outbursts. I don't know if I will bother to finish it. My fears were confirmed, he is as messed up as I thought and more. It doesn't change the fact we are screwed until he is gone.
julieh2's review
4.0
By 2021, I really did not want to read about or think about this despicable, pathetic man any more than I already had. However, I am so glad that I decided to read this book and I do wish every American would read it.
Mary Trump explains how her uncle has rarely been held accountable for anything. As a young person, he didn't face repercussions for bad behavior. In fact, he was consistently rewarded for bullying and his failures were somehow always ignored while his obnoxious behavior was celebrated.
Time after time, whenever he was lacking in skill or experience or aptitude (most of the time), he filled in the gaps with a bombastic boastfulness- and people bought it! It is remarkable that someone who is so unskilled and utterly lacking in ability- a failure by any definition- could have ascended to the level of President of the United States.
In addition to this curious subversion of the typical way we raise children (encouraging them to do what's right, to think of others, to share, etc.), Mary Trump also explains how unspeakably sad Donald Trump's early life was. He experienced serious emotional neglect and abandonment that must have been very painful. His father was a ruthless, emotionally vacant man who treated his wife and children with disdain and cruelty. His mother didn't offer any warmth either. Basically there was just a complete absence of love in the family. It is easy to see how this upbringing helped create an adult who always treats others with callous disregard and who was capable of enacting such brutal and heartless policies during his time in office.
The book is very sad overall. I felt for Mary and her brother, who were treated in an unbelievably callous and unjust manner by Donald Trump and his siblings- who, upon their father's death, used all their power and privilege (including lawyers) to prevent their niece and nephew from inheriting any of their grandfather's extreme wealth. It is sickening to read about the selfishness and cruelty that many members of the Trump family exhibit- and this certainly seems to continue to be true of the next generation (Donald Trump's children seem as self-absorbed, obnoxious, heartless, oblivious to the pain of others as their father, aunts & uncle).
Overall, this book sheds light on an infamous figure and helps us as we strive to understand how a person who failed at every project he ever attempted and had to constantly be bailed out by his wealthy father, can appear to think so highly of himself- while the rest of us find him so utterly repugnant.
Mary Trump explains how her uncle has rarely been held accountable for anything. As a young person, he didn't face repercussions for bad behavior. In fact, he was consistently rewarded for bullying and his failures were somehow always ignored while his obnoxious behavior was celebrated.
Time after time, whenever he was lacking in skill or experience or aptitude (most of the time), he filled in the gaps with a bombastic boastfulness- and people bought it! It is remarkable that someone who is so unskilled and utterly lacking in ability- a failure by any definition- could have ascended to the level of President of the United States.
In addition to this curious subversion of the typical way we raise children (encouraging them to do what's right, to think of others, to share, etc.), Mary Trump also explains how unspeakably sad Donald Trump's early life was. He experienced serious emotional neglect and abandonment that must have been very painful. His father was a ruthless, emotionally vacant man who treated his wife and children with disdain and cruelty. His mother didn't offer any warmth either. Basically there was just a complete absence of love in the family. It is easy to see how this upbringing helped create an adult who always treats others with callous disregard and who was capable of enacting such brutal and heartless policies during his time in office.
The book is very sad overall. I felt for Mary and her brother, who were treated in an unbelievably callous and unjust manner by Donald Trump and his siblings- who, upon their father's death, used all their power and privilege (including lawyers) to prevent their niece and nephew from inheriting any of their grandfather's extreme wealth. It is sickening to read about the selfishness and cruelty that many members of the Trump family exhibit- and this certainly seems to continue to be true of the next generation (Donald Trump's children seem as self-absorbed, obnoxious, heartless, oblivious to the pain of others as their father, aunts & uncle).
Overall, this book sheds light on an infamous figure and helps us as we strive to understand how a person who failed at every project he ever attempted and had to constantly be bailed out by his wealthy father, can appear to think so highly of himself- while the rest of us find him so utterly repugnant.
shereadsceaselessly's review against another edition
5.0
“Whether Donald understood the underlying message or not, Fred did: in family, as in life, there could be only one winner; everybody else had to lose. Freddy kept trying and failing to do the right thing; Donald began to realize that there was nothing he could do wrong, so he stopped trying to do anything “right.” He became bolder and more aggressive because he was rarely challenged or held to account by the only person in the world who mattered—his father. Fred liked his killer attitude, even if it manifested as bad behavior.”
Geez, I thought my family was dysfunctional.
[a:Mary L. Trump|20417270|Mary L. Trump|https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/nophoto/user/f_50x66-6a03a5c12233c941481992b82eea8d23.png] -- girl, I feel you.
Geez, I thought my family was dysfunctional.
[a:Mary L. Trump|20417270|Mary L. Trump|https://s.gr-assets.com/assets/nophoto/user/f_50x66-6a03a5c12233c941481992b82eea8d23.png] -- girl, I feel you.
maryjo70's review against another edition
4.0
It was good. I didn't learn much new. Mary Trump is a good writer and certainly makes a compelling case that he is off his rocker.
eam84's review
5.0
Well written. I wish it had more information on Donald, but Mary's been cut off from the family for years. The sequel needs to be why so many in government have chosen to enable him.
tbookstwo's review
4.0
- Wealth can shield us from consequences, but it cannot buy the love and validation we truly crave.
- A lack of accountability within a family can foster an environment where harmful behaviors go unchecked.
- The pursuit of success can morph into a destructive obsession, driving individuals to disregard their relationships and humanity.
- When love is conditional, it creates a chasm between family members, leading to isolation rather than connection.
- To understand the actions of those in power, we must examine the influence of their upbringing and the lessons learned at home.
- A lack of accountability within a family can foster an environment where harmful behaviors go unchecked.
- The pursuit of success can morph into a destructive obsession, driving individuals to disregard their relationships and humanity.
- When love is conditional, it creates a chasm between family members, leading to isolation rather than connection.
- To understand the actions of those in power, we must examine the influence of their upbringing and the lessons learned at home.
cherold's review against another edition
2.0
A lot of people I follow on Twitter highly recommended this book, and I read a number of intriguing excerpts highlight what a twisted monster Trump is and has always been that made me look forward to reading it. But unfortunately, while this may be an important book in terms of giving a fuller picture of the monster in the White House, it's also remarkably tedious.
The great appeal of this book is that Trump has a slight but lifelong relationship with Trump and knows his family. This allows her to tell a lot of family lore. But while that lore can be interesting, it is only about 20% of a book that is primarily tedious psychoanalysis.
I certainly think Trump is a narcissistic psychopath, but that doesn't mean I want to read a book that is simply someone who knows him blathering on for page after page about what a disaster he is. Mary Trump ignores the famous writer's edict, "show, don't tell," and instead tells us over and over again how vile Trump is, spinning out her theories from small but telling incidents.
I only made it through the first chapter and a half; it's really a pretty agonizing slog. This might have made a solid article in the New Yorker, but as a book there's just not enough to it.
The great appeal of this book is that Trump has a slight but lifelong relationship with Trump and knows his family. This allows her to tell a lot of family lore. But while that lore can be interesting, it is only about 20% of a book that is primarily tedious psychoanalysis.
I certainly think Trump is a narcissistic psychopath, but that doesn't mean I want to read a book that is simply someone who knows him blathering on for page after page about what a disaster he is. Mary Trump ignores the famous writer's edict, "show, don't tell," and instead tells us over and over again how vile Trump is, spinning out her theories from small but telling incidents.
I only made it through the first chapter and a half; it's really a pretty agonizing slog. This might have made a solid article in the New Yorker, but as a book there's just not enough to it.