fynn_jls's review against another edition
hopeful
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? A mix
- Strong character development? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
3.0
wouldn't really recomend it, especially to queer/trans people. I feel like the book was written from a very cis perspective and for a very cis audience
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia, Deadnaming, and Outing
Moderate: Medical content and Injury/Injury detail
kylosten's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
funny
reflective
medium-paced
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.75
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia
Moderate: Homophobia and Deadnaming
Minor: Gun violence
tialedvina's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
informative
sad
tense
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? It's complicated
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
3.75
I am struggling with what score to give this book.
On one hand - I found myself totally and completely captivated by the Walsh-Adams family and the writing style. The book itself is fabulous and the prose is excellent.
I fell hard for the boys, the brothers, and their silly boyish antics and how they loved Poppy with every fiber of their beings. They felt so real to me that I, a child free person by choice, actually wondered what it might be like to have a gaggle of boys like that.
The family dynamics also caught my interest, and I really enjoyed the way parenting was shown as a constant, ever-changing battle.
Poppy herself was honestly very sweet. I wanted to wrap her up and give her all the love and snuggles she deserves because God she is such a good kid. She has my whole heart!
I also really liked the narrator, even if her pronunciation of Wisconsin was weird (as a born and bred Wisconsinite, no one ever says it right except us). Her voice was smooth and easy to listen to!
Now here's why I gave this less than four stars.
I hated Rosie. I hated her so much I would legitimately scream at her in my car when she'd say something or think something. I understand why she was the way she was, why she had such a hard time with Poppy/Claude and the transition. I understand her character completely. It doesn't mean I hated her any less.
I liked Penn a bit more, but he also annoyed the shit out of me. Where Rosie went the direction of almost being transphobic in places, Penn went the complete opposite and was way too much in places.
I KNOW they're not supposed to be perfect, and if anything, the fact I hated them in their own ways was probably indicative of how well this was written. But as a member of the queer community myself, I don't find this to be a great roadmap for championing queer issues. It's written mostly from the perspective of cis hetero people, and these issues are incredibly delicate.
This doesn't mean I didn't like it, but I really hope people don't read this book and see it as the epitome of raising a trans kid. Because you can do a LOT better (and frankly, should) than Rosie and Penn did with Poppy.
At the end of the day, I really did like the story and it was nice to read something that wasn't just all good in every way. This book was challenging for me in the best kind of way, and I think because of that it deserves the praise it receives. My feelings for it are complex and that's more than I've felt about a book for a long time.
On one hand - I found myself totally and completely captivated by the Walsh-Adams family and the writing style. The book itself is fabulous and the prose is excellent.
I fell hard for the boys, the brothers, and their silly boyish antics and how they loved Poppy with every fiber of their beings. They felt so real to me that I, a child free person by choice, actually wondered what it might be like to have a gaggle of boys like that.
The family dynamics also caught my interest, and I really enjoyed the way parenting was shown as a constant, ever-changing battle.
Poppy herself was honestly very sweet. I wanted to wrap her up and give her all the love and snuggles she deserves because God she is such a good kid. She has my whole heart!
I also really liked the narrator, even if her pronunciation of Wisconsin was weird (as a born and bred Wisconsinite, no one ever says it right except us). Her voice was smooth and easy to listen to!
Now here's why I gave this less than four stars.
I hated Rosie. I hated her so much I would legitimately scream at her in my car when she'd say something or think something. I understand why she was the way she was, why she had such a hard time with Poppy/Claude and the transition. I understand her character completely. It doesn't mean I hated her any less.
I liked Penn a bit more, but he also annoyed the shit out of me. Where Rosie went the direction of almost being transphobic in places, Penn went the complete opposite and was way too much in places.
I KNOW they're not supposed to be perfect, and if anything, the fact I hated them in their own ways was probably indicative of how well this was written. But as a member of the queer community myself, I don't find this to be a great roadmap for championing queer issues. It's written mostly from the perspective of cis hetero people, and these issues are incredibly delicate.
This doesn't mean I didn't like it, but I really hope people don't read this book and see it as the epitome of raising a trans kid. Because you can do a LOT better (and frankly, should) than Rosie and Penn did with Poppy.
At the end of the day, I really did like the story and it was nice to read something that wasn't just all good in every way. This book was challenging for me in the best kind of way, and I think because of that it deserves the praise it receives. My feelings for it are complex and that's more than I've felt about a book for a long time.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Outing, Transphobia, and Deadnaming
Moderate: Medical content and Medical trauma
rachelkreadsbookz's review
emotional
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
5.0
Content Warnings
Graphic: Deadnaming and Transphobia
lynsea's review
emotional
hopeful
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? It's complicated
4.0
Such lovable characters, such a rough story that thankfully the whole family powers through. Protect trans youth. Also likely a good read for parents of trans children.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia and Homophobia
Moderate: Bullying
thebelugaloo's review
I felt the sensitive subject matter, having a transgender child, was handled very poorly. I understand it's a complex issue and the author may have been trying for complex characters interacting with the subject matter, but up to this page it has only been extremely uneducated opinions and unrealistic/unreasonable reactions. I cannot point to one character I thought was handling the situation appropriately.
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia, Bullying, and Deadnaming
paeten_'s review
emotional
hopeful
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
4.25
Content Warnings
Graphic: Deadnaming and Transphobia
bexxtrafresh's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? Yes
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
5.0
Hopeful. Insightful. Addresses transgender topics from both parents and a child’s perspective, exploring their gender spectrum, gender identity, stereotypes, and related ways to support people in an approachable way.
Claude loves to wear dresses. He’s learning where he falls on the gender spectrum. His family is mostly loving and supportive. The change of pronouns as Claude/Poppy grow and change were impeccable. The realistic discussions throughout are well written and thoughtful, i.e. the school administration, Claude’s older brothers, Poppy’s friends, discussions over Claude & Poppy’s “correct” bathroom.
Content Warnings
Moderate: Homophobia and Transphobia
paulilina's review against another edition
challenging
emotional
hopeful
informative
reflective
sad
medium-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Loveable characters? It's complicated
4.5
Content Warnings
Moderate: Transphobia, Violence, and Gun violence
beebeewin's review against another edition
emotional
hopeful
reflective
slow-paced
- Plot- or character-driven? Character
- Strong character development? Yes
- Loveable characters? Yes
- Diverse cast of characters? It's complicated
- Flaws of characters a main focus? Yes
4.25
I enjoyed this novel and would definitely recommend this book to anyone confused or interested in learning more about raising a child who is gender non-conforming. What I enjoyed about this book is how slow and deliberate Laurie Frankel was with everything. Nothing felt rushed as Frankel intricately went over all the details of Claude/Poppy's transition and the transformation of the entire family. It felt so deeply personal and it was wonderful to get the perspective of almost every character in this novel. I will say that slowness at times seemed to come at the sacrifice of really following up on some plot points. It felt like there were moments when characters were given highlights and it seemed like something more was coming for them but it never did. Either way it was still a fantastic read, and as a non-parent it hit on things I think I would be concerned or confused about if I was put in this situation. I think what Frankel puts into perspective is just how much being trans isn't a choice but a necessity for these children and the choices are instead how to help them exist in a world that doesn't give them freedom to be themselves. "They had, she could finally see, been choosing out of fear.... They needed their fear dispelled, she and Penn and Claude and Poppy, because they could not live in fear anymore. But everyone else needed their fear dispelled too because that's where all the trouble was." Frankel doesn't downplay how violence, fear, and discrimination is real for these families and their children, but you have to as Frankel says "build someplace solid as ramparts from which" the child can figure out how they fit into the world and see what "possibilities we never saw before, possibilities no one ever saw before." What I wasn't expected is this very sentiment, how Frankel believes not that we should all learn respect and acceptance but instead shift our whole society to be more open to diversity, difference, and non-conformance. For the author's note, "I wish for my child, for all our children, a world where they can be who they are and become their most loved, blessed, appreciated selves... For my child, for all our children, I want more options, more paths through the woods, wider ranges of normal, and unconditional love." I feel like this novel would be incredibly powerful for those who are parents and or thinking of becoming parents. Not only would it help someone understand what it would be like to raise a gender non-conforming child but also any child who sits outside of the norms of society.
Honestly, to me the author's note had some of the most powerful statements of the whole novel. I am going to put one more quote that I feel like every parent needs to hear.
"The novelist in me is inspired by how much raising children is like writing books: You don't know where they're going until they get there. You may think you do, but you're wrong. Corralling and forcing them against their will to go where you first imagined they would isn't going to work for anyone involved. Never mind you're the one writing and raising them, they are headed in their own direction, independent of you. And scary thought that is, it's also how it should be."
Honestly, to me the author's note had some of the most powerful statements of the whole novel. I am going to put one more quote that I feel like every parent needs to hear.
"The novelist in me is inspired by how much raising children is like writing books: You don't know where they're going until they get there. You may think you do, but you're wrong. Corralling and forcing them against their will to go where you first imagined they would isn't going to work for anyone involved. Never mind you're the one writing and raising them, they are headed in their own direction, independent of you. And scary thought that is, it's also how it should be."
Content Warnings
Graphic: Transphobia, Violence, and Gun violence