margarete's review
3.0
took me forever to finish and that definitely affected its resonance. would recommend tho!
eljarvo's review against another edition
informative
reflective
medium-paced
4.0
Didn’t really like the meditation aspect as can’t read and meditate at the same time but otherwise found insightful and reassuring!
rick2's review
3.0
As a communication tool in a relationship “this is how things sometimes look to me, maybe you can understand” I think this book is fantastic. I think you create a shared language about avoidance and asking for your needs to be met that is really positive and healthy.
However, I think, as a sort of psychological, therapeutic modality, this book is not very helpful. It’s sort of bastardized internal family systems model that doesn’t resonate with any of the readings I’ve done there beyond just kind of holding space for your inner child. I think there’s a sort of mindfulness component of recognizing feelings and processing through them, but it’s just overly complicated and couched in this sort of need to be unique. Parts of this felt overly infantilizing. Generally, I thought that “actionable” parts of the book we’re pretty obtuse. The points about healing are disconnected. I did not find a through put on it other than to just deal with stuff as it comes up.
Read it as a discussion piece not as something that will help you fix your love life
However, I think, as a sort of psychological, therapeutic modality, this book is not very helpful. It’s sort of bastardized internal family systems model that doesn’t resonate with any of the readings I’ve done there beyond just kind of holding space for your inner child. I think there’s a sort of mindfulness component of recognizing feelings and processing through them, but it’s just overly complicated and couched in this sort of need to be unique. Parts of this felt overly infantilizing. Generally, I thought that “actionable” parts of the book we’re pretty obtuse. The points about healing are disconnected. I did not find a through put on it other than to just deal with stuff as it comes up.
Read it as a discussion piece not as something that will help you fix your love life
bf54life's review
challenging
hopeful
informative
medium-paced
3.0
i like this book, as far as self help goes it’s not the most transformative but also not bad. my biggest qualm is that a lot of the book acts as a meditation guide rather than a readable book, when i pick up a book i usually want to read not meditate. but i might buy the book to try the mediations