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lalatut's review against another edition
4.0
I found Wes Hill’s book Washed and Waiting incredibly compelling. He writes poignantly and with deep vulnerability. His voice is one we need to hear.
Yet, the way he talks about himself as a gay Christian could be interpreted as an overemphasis on sexual identity. Because homosexual attraction has been his exclusive experience so far (as opposed to heterosexual attraction) it colors everything about his life and makes him feel separate from those who are opposite-sex attracted. I suspect at the time of writing he was on a continuum of Christian identity that was perhaps not as grounded in union with Christ as he might become after maturing in faith over the years.
One of my favorite parts of this book was the addendum, written ten years later, in which he discusses how absolutely vital it is that the Church work from a solid theology of singleness if Christians like himself are going to survive. He talks about the hurt and isolation singles experience when churches treat singleness as temporary, marriage as the norm, or singles as less mature, less equipped, less significant, or simply underestimate their need for deep fellowship.
The way Wes talks about his same-sex-attraction reminded me of the way I think of our own infertility. At first, I battled shame and wondered where I had messed up to deserve infertility. Through God’s grace, I eventually came to view it as an effect of the Curse. Because we live in a world under the curse of sin, aspects of creation are broken. My body inexplicably cannot conceive a child and it is because of death. Our bodies don’t work “right”. Yet, we have a God who is good and has sovereignly ordained that the privilege of bearing children in my body be withheld from me (my daughters were both adopted). Wes seems to think of his same sex attraction similarly - something in him is broken because of a sin-cursed world and yet a good God calls him to resist temptation and live a celibate life. If I were counseling him, I don't think I would disagree.
There is a space between attraction and lustful intent, it might be hard to delineate, but it's still there and this is a significant aspect to consider whether dealing with same sex attraction or heterosexual attraction. A believer struggling with same sex attraction needs to be comforted that they are not any more repulsive to God than anyone else. “We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way and the Lord has laid on [Jesus] the iniquity of us all.” Isaiah 53:6 applies to those who are same-sex attracted and those who are not. No matter what the sin is or where it begins, we are all in need of redemption, atonement, and restoration. One day, someday, we will be fully restored. The sins we struggle with now, whether in our actions, flesh, mind, emotions, instincts or all of the above will be eradicated once and for all. Death will be put to death and there will be no more temptation, no more shame, no more separation, and no more loneliness. We will be whole. All things will be made new and the struggle with same sex attraction, as well as heterosexual lust and every other form of sin and suffering will be gone. Not only that, but God will dwell with us and we and will bask in full understanding that we are loved.
Yet, the way he talks about himself as a gay Christian could be interpreted as an overemphasis on sexual identity. Because homosexual attraction has been his exclusive experience so far (as opposed to heterosexual attraction) it colors everything about his life and makes him feel separate from those who are opposite-sex attracted. I suspect at the time of writing he was on a continuum of Christian identity that was perhaps not as grounded in union with Christ as he might become after maturing in faith over the years.
One of my favorite parts of this book was the addendum, written ten years later, in which he discusses how absolutely vital it is that the Church work from a solid theology of singleness if Christians like himself are going to survive. He talks about the hurt and isolation singles experience when churches treat singleness as temporary, marriage as the norm, or singles as less mature, less equipped, less significant, or simply underestimate their need for deep fellowship.
The way Wes talks about his same-sex-attraction reminded me of the way I think of our own infertility. At first, I battled shame and wondered where I had messed up to deserve infertility. Through God’s grace, I eventually came to view it as an effect of the Curse. Because we live in a world under the curse of sin, aspects of creation are broken. My body inexplicably cannot conceive a child and it is because of death. Our bodies don’t work “right”. Yet, we have a God who is good and has sovereignly ordained that the privilege of bearing children in my body be withheld from me (my daughters were both adopted). Wes seems to think of his same sex attraction similarly - something in him is broken because of a sin-cursed world and yet a good God calls him to resist temptation and live a celibate life. If I were counseling him, I don't think I would disagree.
There is a space between attraction and lustful intent, it might be hard to delineate, but it's still there and this is a significant aspect to consider whether dealing with same sex attraction or heterosexual attraction. A believer struggling with same sex attraction needs to be comforted that they are not any more repulsive to God than anyone else. “We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way and the Lord has laid on [Jesus] the iniquity of us all.” Isaiah 53:6 applies to those who are same-sex attracted and those who are not. No matter what the sin is or where it begins, we are all in need of redemption, atonement, and restoration. One day, someday, we will be fully restored. The sins we struggle with now, whether in our actions, flesh, mind, emotions, instincts or all of the above will be eradicated once and for all. Death will be put to death and there will be no more temptation, no more shame, no more separation, and no more loneliness. We will be whole. All things will be made new and the struggle with same sex attraction, as well as heterosexual lust and every other form of sin and suffering will be gone. Not only that, but God will dwell with us and we and will bask in full understanding that we are loved.
greggchastain's review
challenging
informative
inspiring
reflective
medium-paced
4.5
I appreciated the honest reflections of.living with same sex attractions while choosing to remain celibate in obedience to Christ. Wesley Hill offers challenging thoughts on loneliness, community, and sexuality that are just as important for the heterosexual to hear as the homosexual. The book does great job of putting a human "face" on this difficult subject that seeks a middle ground between the view that would affirm what God has denied and the view that the only path to wholeness is through reparative efforts to somehow become opposite sex attracted.
Well worth the read by any pastor or church seeking how to love the gay or lesbian in their midst.
Well worth the read by any pastor or church seeking how to love the gay or lesbian in their midst.
b2beauchamp's review against another edition
4.0
A challenging yet Biblical look at what it really means to walk with God and to wrestle with Him, and what it looks like to live a Holy life when we feel completely frustrated and filthy. Though this is a discussion about same sex attraction and homosexuality, much of Wesley Hill's discussions about living in light of God's severe mercy and grace are completely applicable to any believer. Finally, this book holds out a challenge to the Church to actually be what it was called and created to be, to actually love people deeply as Christ does and walk with them through the ups and downs.
amber_thiessen's review
3.0
Written on a very hot topic, I appreciated the authors willingness to share his story and how it has impacted his faith and his life. It was filled with good insights into the struggles that he faced, and his perspective on how he was moving forward in faith and trust in the Lord. I recommend it!
katharine2k's review against another edition
challenging
hopeful
informative
inspiring
medium-paced
5.0
gcaseiv's review against another edition
5.0
I completely disagree with everything in this book because it is not my experience or my understanding of the gospel. I do not believe God has revealed himself or led me in this way. However, I admire the honesty and consideration put into this and the care and compassion with which it is presented.
adamrshields's review against another edition
4.0
Short review: This is a short book (only 160 pages) but I think it does more to describe a right understanding of Christian sexuality than most marriage and sex books I have read.
The first half of the book is biographical, describing how Hill became aware of his sexual orientation and then how he came to the place of understanding celibacy as the only option for him. I think the description of the struggle is important to his understanding. Many do not come to the same place, but I think he clearly describes how he came to the position.
The second half walks through brief bios of two other celibate Christians and attempts to ground his understanding in something more than his 20 something experience.
I think this is a good book both to understand one person's view of homosexuality and the issues it raises as a Christian, but also a takes a different look at the purpose and meaning of sexuality as Christians. As someone committed to abstaining from sex, Hill brings some fresh eyes.
Full review at my blog http://bookwi.se/washed-and-waiting-reflections-on-christian-faithfulness-and-homosexuality-by-wesley-hill/
The first half of the book is biographical, describing how Hill became aware of his sexual orientation and then how he came to the place of understanding celibacy as the only option for him. I think the description of the struggle is important to his understanding. Many do not come to the same place, but I think he clearly describes how he came to the position.
The second half walks through brief bios of two other celibate Christians and attempts to ground his understanding in something more than his 20 something experience.
I think this is a good book both to understand one person's view of homosexuality and the issues it raises as a Christian, but also a takes a different look at the purpose and meaning of sexuality as Christians. As someone committed to abstaining from sex, Hill brings some fresh eyes.
Full review at my blog http://bookwi.se/washed-and-waiting-reflections-on-christian-faithfulness-and-homosexuality-by-wesley-hill/
gjones19's review against another edition
4.0
Wesley Hill walks a delicate - and rare - line between traditional Christian sexual ethics and the affirmation of same-sex attracted individuals. Hill’s story and theology offers a pointed critique of the Evangelical church and a challenge to those who mold theology to fit their desire.
aspiringorakle's review
4.0
I suppose I was hoping more for a rationale of the problems with homosexuality, and Hill more or less asserted the traditional reading of scripture. In some sense this is valid, and he did his best to show me that understanding precisely why it is bad is not really the question. I always find it hard to object to these kind of books, filled with descriptions of deep suffering and pain--especially this one, with its talk of loneliness, isolation, and desperation to please. Hill's arguments on the whole were convincing, and it was a good read.