cmlalonde's review against another edition

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emotional funny hopeful informative inspiring reflective slow-paced

4.0


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peachybee53's review against another edition

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challenging informative inspiring reflective slow-paced

5.0

This is not an exaggeration: every woman - no, person - should read this book. It will change your life.
It has certainly been a slow and challenging read, but I have learnt so much about my body, brain, expectations, desires, stressors and methods of looking at it all in a new, non-judgemental, compassionate way. Some of my biggest takeaways are the 'sexual brakes and accelorators,' statistics of the ways women typically experience their sexualities compared to men, and the ways that stress, contexts and learned mindfulness can impact your sexual desire (as well as your self-image and general life).
Though certainly aimed at cisgender women (from biological, scientific, social and cultural views), most of the points made in this book would be beneficial to everyone. I love the way it all comes from a place of 'no matter what your experience is, you are normal. You can find happiness and satisfaction. You are not alone. You are beautiful.

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lizpickering's review against another edition

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hopeful informative inspiring reflective medium-paced

5.0


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alexiconic's review against another edition

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hopeful informative inspiring medium-paced

4.5

what a great, loving, easy-to-read book. it’s a great clarification of how sex works for many people, especially but definitely not just women. its funny, filled with experience (personal and professional) and reassurance that, whatever your body does, unless you are in pain, you’re probably really normal. 

i do wish there was a little bit more attention towards other genders (although that may be another book entirely), as i’m still not clear on why in general women experience responsive desire to a larger extent than others. perhaps the details on that are still out. 

and i wish there was a bit more development on to how to move on from realizing that - bluntly - you are normal and feeling anger because of the persistent, incorrect and harmful messages around us. like, what do you do with that anger, sadness? how exactly can you process it without becoming stuck in it? 

but those are two small things in an otherwise very accessible and well-written book. 

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growintogardens's review against another edition

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informative medium-paced

4.25

Lots of important scientific info about sex. The writing was accessible, but a little awkward at times. The audiobook had music at times which was weird and annoying. There was a lot of repetition, which can be helpful for people to retain info, but it was a bit much. Overall, I learned a few things that made me feel better about myself and sex in general. 

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carlar's review against another edition

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hopeful informative inspiring reflective medium-paced

4.0

Reading this book will probably be the first time you hear there is nothing wrong or broken about your sexuality. It’s informative, easy to understand, and has something for everyone.

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takarakei's review against another edition

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informative medium-paced

4.0


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riverofhorton's review against another edition

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challenging funny hopeful informative inspiring reflective slow-paced

3.75

So much of this book is useful... To someone else.

I found I didn't learn a vast amount from this book, and the bits I did learn gave me more of a "Huh, so that answers this personal trauma question", rather than increasing my understanding of sexuality in general.

So many times the book says something, then it'll say "More on that in chapter x." or "Remember this from chapter y?" and it just served as a jolt in the flow.

One of the things I didn't like, and feel I need to mention: This book uses gender where it should be using sex, and woman where it should be using AFAB, etc. I understand that this was likely done to avoid confusing sex the action with sex the characteristic, but it's the kind of thing that I can see affecting other trans masc people more than I. Using gender (and woman) implies that this book would not apply to trans guys, because gender, but it does apply to us (without surgical intervention) because sex.

It does also seem to portray "Don't want/enjoy sex, that's OKay, change the context and you will." Which skirts a little too close to being Acephobic for my comfort. Some people just aren't interested in sex, and that's OKay.

The basic sum, is that this seems to very much be aimed at the cis woman in a heterosexual monogamous relationship seeking to understand her body and sexuality. Which is great for the cishet woman in a mono relationship. And while there are bits that can be applied to folx that don't fit those categories, the lack of inclusive language is noticeable.

Overall, I can see why this book is so popular, and I will be recommending it to others, with the above caveat as needed, but I just didn't get much out of it that I couldn't have got from trauma therapy.

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bootsmom3's review against another edition

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challenging emotional funny hopeful informative inspiring lighthearted medium-paced

4.0


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lizziaha's review against another edition

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4.0

Slightly outside the target audience for this book, but good info nonetheless. 

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